


Sacrifices Need to be Made

by orphan_account



Series: Sacrifices [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Angst, Distraught Aunt May, Distraught Tony Stark, Experimentation, Gen, Guilt, Hurt Peter Parker, Insecure Peter Parker, Kidnapping, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Protective Tony Stark, Psychological Torture, Recovery, Suicidal Thoughts, Supportive Avenger Team, Supportive Avengers, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Torture, Worried Avengers Team, Worried Tony Stark, no infinity war spoilers, worried Aunt May
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-03
Updated: 2018-06-25
Packaged: 2019-05-17 22:07:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 26,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14840045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: It was supposed to be a simple, easy mission. However things did not go as planned at all. With Tony and the rest of the Avengers' lives at stake, Peter must give himself up to save his team. Chaos erupts.





	1. Prologue

"Dammit! Peter, don't you dare!"

"This is the only way Mister Stark. I'm sorry," Peter offers the distraught man a smile, but his eyes are clouded with fear.

"No, listen, P-,"but before Tony could finish Peter interrupted him.

"Mister Stark, you have to look after everyone. Make sure May is okay and-," without giving the young man a chance to complete his thought, the villains grabbed him and left, not a trace of Peter behind.


	2. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> May is aware that Peter is Spider-Man and his relationship with Tony and the Avengers.

Peter is awoken with the loud, bothersome noise of his cellphone.

"Mmm, Mister Stark is this important? It's just so early in the morning and my bed is really comfortable and-,"

"Kid, WAKE THE HELL UP! We need you at the Compound, and if you're not here within at least 10 minutes I will send Cap to personally drag you out of your twin bed so that I can personally whoop your ass!" with these words, Peter was up and running. Writing a little note for May, he quickly put on his suit and rushed out of his apartment complex. He swung his way to the Compound as fast as he could, not wanting a lecture from Tony on his lack of ability to be punctual. Luckily, he reached his destination in 6 minutes. He swung down from the building he was hanging from and ran inside.

"Where's the emergency? Do I need to kick some robot ass? What did Bruce set on fire this time? Is everyone okay?" Peter rambled.

"Woah kid, calm down. Nothing's wrong. There's just a mission that we need to go on, and the help of Spiderman would be very helpful. I just needed you to hurry, considering you live in Queens," Tony explains, smirking at the boy's red face.

"Jesus Christ, Mister Stark, I nearly crashed into a tree on my way!" Peter complained.

"Don't think I won't send you to Captain Small Ass for your choice of words," Tony threatened.

"Well, Iron Ass, the Capsicle is right upstairs if ya want him," Clint said, smiling. Peter jumped, startled by the Avenger's appearance.

"Mister Hawkeye! Good morning!" Peter said with a bright smile.

"Hiya Pete. Did Stark give you some bullshit over the phone telling you to get your ass on over here?"  
"Um, excuse me, hi? Right here, Robin Hood. Now, we have to go so tell the rest of the mother fu- I mean the team- that we need to go," Tony interrupts. Peter smiles and bounces on the balls of his feet. He's been on missions before, but it's always thrilling. He loves the adrenaline rush, the feeling he gets when he does something great. Peter loves his job, loves that he can protect the people of his city, of his home. A sudden war cry interrupted Peter's thoughts.

"Let's go kick some ass!" Sam Wilson whooped.

"Not in front of the kid, Wilson!" Captain America warned. The Falcon stuck his tongue out at the older man, and reached over to ruffle Peter's hair.

"Ah, he doesn't mind. Right Petey?"

"Enough chit-chat, let's go!" came the irritated voice of Tony Stark.  
**  
The threat in the city was no other than Damian Toomes. Not only was he the father of Adrian Toomes-aka the Vulture- he had quite the grudge against the Avengers. Toomes had previously tried to sell weapons of mass destruction, along with illegal substances that would enhance a human or too, not unlike the serum that HYDRA had created. When the Avengers found out, they tried to demolish the deadly black market. Although they had apprehended most of Toomes's men, they had never caught the man himself. And now he was back, and with what the Avengers would discover to be some of the deadliest weapons ever created.

"If it isn't the Big D himself! Finally back, I see. Too bad you won't be around to finish what you started," Tony sneered.

"On the contrary, Shithead Starky, I do think I will be around to see what happens. You have no idea what I'm capable of now," Damian replied coolly.

"Oh kiss my ass. Underoo-," before Tony could finish his command Damian had pulled out and clicked the button that would bring the downfall of the Avengers. The Avengers braced themselves but nothing happened. It was completely silent. And then Clint burst out into laughter.

"What the hell? I was so prepared to die and then-" before he could finish, the building they were standing on collapsed. Peter, thanks to his spidey-senses, shot a web that tied Hawkeye, The Black Widow, Bucky, and Captain America together and he swung them to the ground safely. The rest of the Avengers flew.

"That the best you can do?" Peter asked, laughing.

"Oh little boy, you don't know the things you can do. For example, you just guided most of the Avengers onto the ground where my men are, with even more weapons,"

Sure enough, there was a shout from below. But it wasn't just a shout, it sounded like screams of pain. Peter looked down and saw a man holding a very large, futuristic gun. The Avengers were on the floor, moaning in pain. Before Peter could react, the weapon went off, this time targeting Sam and Tony. The two Avengers fell like stones, and Peter yelled, trying to save them. He was too late, however, and the pair crashed into the ground.

"You see little man? You can't stop me. No one can stop me," Toomes announced triumphantly. With another press of a button on his remote, the Avengers on the floor all yelled out as a surge of electricity overcame them.

"No, no stop!" Peter begged.

"You see little Spiderling? I can't be stopped. However, I'll make a deal with you. I need an enhanced individual, one who won't die on me to quickly. I need someone to test my weapons on, make sure they work before selling them. Come with me, and I'll let the rest of the Avengers go," Toomes said with an evil grin.

"No... Peter, don't!" came the raspy protest from Clint. Before Peter could reply, another shock of electricity overcame the group.

"Stop! I'll go, I'll go!" Peter yelled.

"Dammit! Peter, don't you dare!"

"This is the only way Mister Stark. I'm sorry," Peter offers the distraught man a smile, but his eyes are clouded with fear.

"No, listen, P-"but before Tony could finish Peter interrupted him.

"Mister Stark, you have to look after everyone. Make sure May is okay and-," without giving the young man a chance to complete his thought, the villains grabbed him and left, not a trace of Peter behind.

"No! Peter!" Tony heaves himself up with a groan of pain.

But it was too late, Toomes and Peter were gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any thoughts? I'm sorry, it was a bit rushed, but I wanted to get the first chapter up as fast as I could:)


	3. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a lot of spare time- thankfully- so I figured I might as well write the next chapter. Enjoy!  
> Warning- Panic Attack

Saying that Tony was worried was the understatement of the year. Peter had willingly given himself up and God knows what was happening to him right now. The Avengers had all managed to return to the compound, but that didn't mean they were resting. They had to figure out where the hell Peter and Toomes went. The quicker they got the youngest Avenger back, the quicker they will be relaxed.

"Oh shit. Tony! Hey Tony!"

Quick as a lightning bolt, Tony ran to the voice.

"What? Did you find him? Where is he?"

"No, Tony I'm sorry. But we'll find him, I swear. I was going to ask, how the hell are we supposed to tell the kid's aunt?" Sam asked nervously. Oh fuck. Oh FUCK. May. How the living hell was he supposed to tell May that her nephew was now a captive of one of the most insane men Tony knew? Oh dear God. Peter. He could be being tortured or experimented on and it was all Tony's fault and oh my God, what if they couldn't find him in time. Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. Peter. Is Peter okay? Dear God, Tony hoped Peter is okay, and now Tony can't breathe, he can't fucking breathe.

"Tony? Tony! TONY!" And suddenly he's on the floor and he doesn't even remember how he got there, all he knows is that he can't breathe.

"Tony! Breathe with me, yeah?" Sam exaggerated his breathing, hoping Tony would follow. "That's it, Tony. Inhale, exhale, you got this. It'll be fine. We'll find him. We'll find him," Sam assured him. Finally, Tony's breathing slowed, his panic attack receding.

"We'll find him,"

**

They would find him. They would. Peter had no doubt that the Avengers would come after him, why wouldn't they? They would come for him.

"They aren't coming for you, you know. For starters, they won't know where the hell to find you," Toomes said with a sneer.

"Whatever ya wanna think. I try not to be influenced by maniacs with devices of torture, but whatever you want," Peter replied with a smirk.

"Talk all you want. Soon enough you won't want to. And you know what else? Stark and the rest of them won't want you when I'm done with you. You'll be broken, you'll be scared. You won't be you," Toomes threatened. That shut Peter up. He already had fears that Mister Stark won't want him if he fucks up. He definitely won't want him if he's broken and useless. 

_I won't break then. I won't. I'll stay strong, and Mister Stark will come get me._

_**_

No leads. None. Not a single clue as to where Peter was. Tony closed his eyes in frustration. God, all he wanted,  _needed,_ was one. fucking. lead. But he had none. He had none. 

**

God, Peter was scared.  He was even more scared when the van he was in lurched to a sudden stop.

"Ok, kid. Get the hell out and let's get started,"

_Oh God._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of angst for you guys. The real fun will begin in the next chapter. Don't worry Aunt May will be making an appearance. Thanks for reading, I really appreciate it :)


	4. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning- descriptions of torture(continues for most of the story)

_Jesus fucking Christ._

Tony needed help, like Dr. Phil help. If this continued, he would lose his damn mind. It's been 48 hours since Peter was taken, and Tony couldn't handle the stress of worrying about him constantly, wondering if he was okay. Obviously, he wasn't okay, he was held hostage by a psychopath with a really fucked up beard, but Tony prayed that he wasn't hurt. 

**

The Aunt hadn't taken the news so well.

_"He's gone? What the hell do you mean 'he's gone'?"_

_"I'm sorry, I really am, but he gave himself up and I couldn't do anything, and oh god. We'll get him back, May. We'll get him the hell back, and when we do he'll be talking our ears off about Star Wars," Tony promised._

_"How do I know he's safe? He's gone, Tony. Gone. And what if you can't find him? What if he die-," May didn't finish, couldn't finish. She crumpled to her knees, sobbing. Tony caught her, and together they prayed for Peter's safety._

_**_

May had come to live in the Avenger's tower with Tony until they found Peter. 

"I have to be here, I have to know everything and see what information we can get to rescue my boy. I'll stay here forever if it promises my baby's safe return," May announced forcefully. Tony wasn't in any position to object, this was her kid that was in danger. There was nothing so far though, not a single lead. It was like Peter had vanished off the face of the earth.

**

"May, we'll get him back. I swear. He saved my life, and God help us all if I can't help save his," Natasha had promised. Steve and Bucky was scarcely at the compound, they were out looking for possible hiding spots, leads, anything. They talked to countless people, trying to see if anyone saw where Peter might have been taken to. They haven't found anything. Nothing at all. Bruce and Tony were working on new facial recognition systems, praying that one of them would help them find Peter. They didn't. 

**

Just when Tony was about to lose his mind, he got an alert.

"FRIDAY? What the hell is this?"

"It appears to be a video file. Would you like me to play it?"

A video file. Those could be traced. They were finally going to find Peter. 

"Play it, Fri."

**

_"Is it focused? We wouldn't want shitty quality getting in the way," said the voice of Damian Toomes. A different voice confirmed that it indeed was, and Toomes came into view._

_"Hello, Tony. So I was originally not going to do this, but your young protege gave me no fucking choice. He has been a bad boy, Tony. Never shuts up, very uncooperative. I can't just let that slide, now can I?"_

_Toomes stepped out of the frame, revealing a bruised and bloody Peter, strapped down to a table._

_"Say hello Peter!"_

Tony inhaled sharply. That was Peter lying on that table, Peter who was bleeding, Peter who was only  _fifteen_. 

_"Fuck off," mumbled Peter._

_"See what I mean Tones? He just won't cooperate with me. And he's so rude as well. Let's fix that."_

_Toomes wheeled over a cart that was covered with a sheet._

_"See this cart, Peter? This cart holds all your worst nightmares and more."_

_"Obviously not all, the ugliest man known to humankind is standing right in front of me," Peter retorted._

"No, kid, shut the hell up, don't infuriate him," Tony pleaded internally.

_Toomes sighed with displeasure._

_"See, this is what we need to fix. I just need a subject you see, not a loudmouthed teen."_

_With a flourish, Toomes took off the sheet that had previously covered the cart, revealing an assortment of knives and other weapons._

Tony shut his eyes.

Please not Peter, anybody but Peter, please.

_A loud, heartbreaking scream sounded from the video._

Tony's eyes snapped back open.

_"See, the fun thing about these knives are that every time it comes into contact with flesh, it delivers a shock of electricity throughout the whole body. Now if we move onto these little syringes here, each contain a different serum, all designed to cause immense pain. Why don't we try this lovely purple one?"_

_"I hate purple. Had an experience with a giant purple raisin in space once. Not pleasant," Peter squirmed in his restraints, trying to avoid the needle._

_"Well, I don't really give a fuck about color preferences,"Toomes replied cruely._

_Before Peter could protest, Toomes swiftly injected Peter with whatever was in the syringe._

_It wasn't long before the screaming began._

Tony hoped he would never have to hear his kid screaming, but the universe must really fucking hate him because now he has a whole video. 

_Peter kept screaming and screaming, he was in so much pain. Tears started rolling down his face, Peter not having the energy to care, he was to busy screaming and yelling._

"Tony! What the hell?!" The Avengers all stormed into the lab where Tony was, hearing the screams of pain. Tony quickly exited out of the video.

"No! Keep May out! She can't see this, shouldn't see this!"

"Shouldn't show me  _what_ Tony?" May demanded, marching up close to him.

"May-,"

"Tony. What the hell were you watching? Oh my god, was that Peter?!"

Tony closed his eyes shut, not wanting the Avengers and most of all May seeing what was happening to Peter, not when he was being tortured.

"Play the damn video, Tony," Natasha demanded.

Squeezing his eyes shut, Tony restarted the video, dreading the moment when Peter's screams would fill his ears yet again.

_**_

_Make it stop, make it stop, MAKE IT STOP!_

_Peter couldn't take anymore, he just wanted to be home, home with May and Tony eating May's disgusting meatloaf._

_I have to stay strong. Mister Stark is coming, he's coming._

_But there was so much pain. He just wanted to sleep._

_But oh god, the pain. It was never ending, always biting at him, tearing him apart._

_"Maybe I deserve this. I should have done more, protected the team better. Oh christ, I'm sorry. I'll be better I'll try harder, I'm so sorry. Please rescue me, take me home. I'll be better, I swear," Peter thought, still consumed by the pain._

_And maybe mercy does exist, because finally the pain overwhelmed him and he fell into unconsciousness where there was no pain._

_**_

_"See Tony? I am capable of so much. This is only the beginning. Think of this as revenge for royally screwing up my life, my family. And the little spiderling? Don't think I don't know_ _what he did to my son, how he messed up his life just like you did mine. Hell's coming, Stark. And when I'm done with him, you'll be on your knees, begging for mercy," Toomes says to the camera with the most evil grin plastered on his face._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did ya catch my little Thanos reference;)? My poor bby Peter, he's gonna have a tough time ahead of him. Like the tags say, Toomes will also be breaking Peter mentally (hence the psychological torture)because Toomes is just kind of a dick tbh. So poor Peter has a long ride ahead of him. Feel free to leave any thoughts or comments, they help me immensely:)


	5. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Psychological(I think? Just to be safe!)torture, torture

The videos kept coming. Every single day without fail, there was a new video for the group of concerned adults. The amount of videos did vary, however. Some days only one would be sent, other days some as much as five were sent. Without fail though, the Avengers and May could count on the videos that would deliver the sounds of Peter's agony.

**

Peter didn't know how much more he could take. Day after day Toomes would lean over his face, his stupid goddamn camera already blinking and recording. Day after day, Peter was shot at with different types of guns, injected with more serums, stabbed with more knives. Peter wanted to give up, he wanted  _so badly_ for the pain to end, to just be with May and Mister Stark and the rest of his family. But he couldn't. He can't give up now, Mister Stark was coming and he was going to be rescued.

"I'm not going to be the little kid who makes Mister Stark's life harder, I won't," Peter promised himself. What good would a broken, damaged teenager be to Tony Stark? Nothing more than a burden. Peter doesn't want to be a burden. So every day, he stares straight into the camera and makes his smartass remarks, makes his sarcastic comments. Because God help him if May or Mister Stark sees him weak and broken. They will take his position with the team immediately, and May won't want a broken kid. She deserves so much better.

So Peter doesn't give up. He screams, but he won't break.

He can't break.

He can't do that to his family.

**

"Tony, it's been a week. He's been gone for a fucking  _week_ and we still have no clue to where he is? My baby is being tortured right now, Stark. I can't lose him, I can't," May sobs, mourning for her lost child.

"I know May, I know. God, I know. We'll get him back. Barton and the rest of them are investigating every possible lead we have, no matter how small. I swear, we'll find him," Tony promises, although he may not be able to keep his-

_Oh hell no._

Tony didn't complete his thought. He wasn't giving up on Peter, he can't. Not when his fucking kid is gone and missing. 

Suddenly, all traces of doubt and fear leave him, replaced with determination and anger.

He's going to find his kid.

**

"Get away from me,"Peter mumbles, already dreading what was going to happen to him now.

"Don't worry, Peter. No tests, no punishments today. No, today we'll be having a little talk, just the two of us," Toomes said, running his hand through Peter's blood soaked hair. Peter flinched from the contact, but he couldn't do anything to stop it.

"What do you want?"Peter asks, his exhaustion radiating from his voice throughout his entire body.

"Like I said. Just a chat. Let's start with Tony Stark. Do you still believe he's coming for you? Answer honestly Peter, I'll know if your lying," Toomes said. Peter had no doubt in his mind that Toomes could detect if he's lying or not. With the various chemicals and drugs running in Peter's system, he wouldn't be surprised if Toomes could read his fucking mind.

"Mister Stark? He's coming. And when he does he's going to kick your Wal-Mart loving ass all the way to hell," Peter insisted

"Do you know how long you've been here? You've been here for a week. You know that I'm sending videos to Tony daily. You can trace videos, Peter. And I've sent him plenty,"

"No, there's a reason. He's coming,"

"He's not, Pete. Get that through your thick skull. Stark? He doesn't give a damn about you, he would have come for you by now if he did. Your aunt? She finally realized that with you out of the picture she can finally live. The Avengers? They can go on missions without worrying about you getting hurt or injured or fucking things up. You see, Peter? It's better this way. You're just an inconvenience,"

Peter didn't have a response for him. Mostly because he knew it was true. Maybe everyone was better off without him...

**

There hasn't been a video yet. Tony was getting worried. As much as he hated those damn videos, they reminded him that Peter was alive. At the same time, it was incredibly frustrating. Tony couldn't do a damn thing to trace the video. Every time he tried, the location led to an abandoned shed in Sokovia. Just to be sure he had sent Cap and Bucky to check it out, but there was nothing there. 

**

"Hiya, Pete. Your one day of rest is over. Guess what we're doing today?"

There was no answer.

"When I ask you a question, I expect you to answer me, Peter,"

"I don't know Toomes. I think we have reached about every method of torture yet,"

"No, no. No, today we'll be testing out some of my son's former weapons. I have managed to find a few that haven't been discarded, and today we'll be having fun with all of them!"

Peter's head snapped up. 

"That's right, you know my son. After all, you ruined his life just like Tony ruined mine. And you, you'll be paying not only for your mistakes, but for Iron Man's as well,"

Peter inhaled sharply.

"And you know what's the best part? Tony actually told me to do this to you. I was going to take him, or perhaps another Avenger, but he said that you fucked up my son's life, so I should make  _you_ pay,"

"No, Mister Stark wouldn't do that. He'd never do that,"

"Oh, but he would Peter. He did, in fact. Why do you still think your here? It's because Tony wants you to be here,"

Against his will, tears started welling up in Peter's eyes. Mister Stark would never do that, he would never purposely hurt him. 

But...

He was a burden. And he made mistakes. It makes sense that Mister Stark would send him here. Now that Peter really thinks about it, it's not unlikely that Mister Stark would send him here.

"I can see you know that I'm right."

And Peter agreed. More tears rolled down his cheeks, but he knew that Toomes was right. Mister Stark wouldn't be coming.

No May.

No Avengers.

No... no Tony.

**

Finally, a video! Tony exhaled in relief, at least he knew Peter was alive.

_"We'll be doing things a little differently today. This isn't a regular video, Tony. No, this is a livestream. Everything you see happening, it's all happening right now," Toomes said with an evil grin, stepping aside to reveal Peter._

"Guys! Get the hell in here! Bruce, see if you can track this, it's live this time, maybe we can actually trace it this time!"

_Peter blinked and muttered something the camera didn't pick up._

_"That's right, Peter. Tony is watching and listening. You want to say something?"_

" _Mister Stark. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. Please get me, Mister Stark. I'm really sorry, I'll be better, just please come get me," Peter pleaded, tears sliding down his cheeks._

"Oh my god, Peter. I'm coming, just give me time. None of this is your fault kid, just stay strong," Tony said, not caring that Peter couldn't hear him.

_"What did I say, Peter? He's not coming. He's glad to be rid of you. He's not fucking coming,"_

_More tears slid down Peter's face, but he didn't make a sound. But he didn't deny Toomes like he usually did._

Christ. What if Peter actually believed this shithead? Did Peter actually think that Tony wouldn't come for him?

_"Well, enough chit-chat. I'm sorry Peter, but you need to pay for what you did. And Tony? He's watching everything that's happening right now, and he's happy. You're finally getting what you deserve,"_

The bastard. 

"Son of a bitch! Don't you fucking touch him!" Clint yelled. It wouldn't do anything, Toomes wouldn't here or care.

"May, don't look, don't look," Natasha said, pulling her into an embrace, pulling May close to her chest.

_"See these Peter? These are the weapons of my son, the one's who should have helped him. But no, you fucked things up, as usual. These weapons haven't been tested yet, Peter. But they will be today,"_

Tony drew in a sharp breath. Toomes had revealed so many weapons. Surely they couldn't  _all_ be for be for Peter.

_"These are all for you, Peter! Don't worry, after these we have a few more, as well as a couple of new serums," Toomes announced jovially._

That son of a bitch.

_"Let's start with this one, yeah? This one looks fun!"_

_Toomes picked up a box, decorated with flashing lights and wires, as well as straps. He put the box on Peter, strapping it in place. He attached the electrode pads to Peter's chest, temples, and his wrists, attaching the wires to him._

_"Now, let's turn it on,"Toomes said pushing a button the remote that controlled the device._

_Peter seized. He jerked on the table he was laying down on, screaming. After a few moments, Toomes turned off the device. Peter gasped, chest heaving. As soon as he caught his breath Toomes turned the device on again._

_"Look, Peter! There are levels! Let's increase it a bit, yeah?"  Toomes pressed another button, increasing the level of pain Peter was experiencing._

_Peter screamed even louder, fighting his restraints, trying to escape the pain._

_Toomes laughed and increased the intensity yet again._

_Peter let out a heartbreaking yell, screaming harder than ever._

Tony was going to throw up. The bitch was torturing Peter, and Peter thought that Tony wanted this to happen. He clenched his eyes shut when Peter let out another heart wrenching scream.

_Toomes kept raising the intensity, enjoying the sound of Peter's pain. Finally, he turned off the device, leaving Peter sobbing and struggling for breath._

_"Oh, I like this one. Unfortunately, we have more to test out," Toomes leaned over Peter, unstrapping him from the box._

_"Oh look! This one looks interesting!"_

_Toomes had picked up a gun. But it didn't look like a normal gun. It was too large, had one too many lights blinking._

"Don't shoot him with that, please don't shoot him with that," murmured Sam.

_Toomes aimed the gun at Peter's leg and fired. The gun let out a blinding ray of light, hitting Peter. Peter yelled out._

"Oh God," Tony breathed. Looking closer at Peter, he saw red gashes and realized that Peter was bleeding. Blood gushed out of several parts of his leg.

_"Ouch. So this one emits a ray of painful light as well as some sharp metals. It has potential. I'll work on it to work more efficiently, and then it'll be perfect!"_

_Peter inhaled deeply, still crying although he made no noise._

_"Moving on to the next one! Don't cry, Pete, there's only two left," chided Toomes._

_He picked up what looked like a taser. He examined the object closely._

_"Ah. So what this does is that it shocks while also stabbing. Yes, I see the bits of sharp metal in there. Wow, Adrian had quite the taste for stabbing, didn't he?"_

_And, without warning, Toomes harshly thrust the device into Peter's side. Peter screamed louder than before. There was so much electricity surging through his body that it was visible, the shock a bright, brilliant blue._

_Toomes removed the weapon from his side, showing a large bleeding cut in Peter's side. There was intense bruising all around the wound._

_"Does that hurt, Peter? I don't give a fuck. You deserve this. You destroyed my son's life, and now you're paying for it," Toomes said, pressing his hand across Peter's wound, causing him to yell out in pain once again._

_"F-fuck you," Peter said, breathing deeply because of his injuries._

_"And that's what's going to make this that much better. This is the last weapon, but don't think for a second you're safe afterwards,"_

It was the last one. 

"Come on kid, you can do it. Just hold on a little longer," Tony pleaded.

_Peter screamed. He screamed and he yelled and he cried. The last weapon was small, but it was painful as hell. Toomes had placed some sort of strange metal device on Peter's head._

_"So what this one does is very interesting. This one transmits an electrical signal to your spinal cord, and eventually travels up to your brain. It also transmits your deepest fears, and magnifies it by a thousand. I'll make use of this one very well," Toomes said, running a hand over his beard, examining Peter carefully. Peter faintly heard his words, but couldn't focus on them, there was too much pain. Too much everything._

_"Well, Peter that's the end of Adrian's weapons. Any last words for the viewers?"_

_Peter raised his head, and stared directly at the camera._

_"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry,"_

_The feed cut off, and everything turned black._

"Bruce. Trace that signal. We are getting Peter back, and I don't give a damn how we do it. We're getting our kid back."

**

Peter was tired. So tired. 

"Come on, Pete. I'm not done with you yet,"

"Go away," mumbled Peter

"No can do, kid. I'm fulfilling Mister Stark's wishes. We wouldn't want to disappoint him, now would we?"

"N-no. Of course not,"

"Then wake the hell up. We have more things to do,"

And Peter wanted to. He can't disappoint Mister Stark more than he already has.

But he can't. He's too tired.

Peter's eyes slip closed, and the darkness closed in around him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of a longer chapter today:)  
> So, I have two directions in the way this story could go. The story's going to end the same no matter which direction I take this, but I want to know which one you guys would prefer. Either I could include more whump, making the story longer, OR I could just continue the story as I originally planned, with less whump. Please let me know in the comments so I know which one you guys would prefer to read(bear in mind that the version with less whump won't make the story less interesting, it will probably include more scenes that focus on Tony and his feelings of the situation, so they will be very angsty).


	6. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning:  
> Mention of suicide

Okay, so things did not go as planned. Yes, Bruce traced the live stream. Yes, they got a location. 

No, they did not get Peter.

They had traced the location, of course. Once again however, there hopes were dashed when it was yet another abandoned warehouse in Sokovia. What was the deal with Sokovia and shady as fuck warehouses? Tony made a mental note to ask Wanda in the future. Shady warehouses aside, Tony was... disappointed? No, that wasn't the correct word. Of course he was upset that they still haven't found Peter. But he wouldn't call it disappointment, no what he was feeling ran much deeper than simple  _disappointment._ Disappointment is what you feel when you don't ace a test, or don't win a science fair.

A science fair.

Tony closed his eyes. Peter had planned out his science fair project with him, obsessing over ideas that he hoped would win. Tony had laughed, ruffling his hair while saying, "Whatever you want, kid. I know you're gonna win no matter what you preset." Peter had grinned at him and replied, "Only because you helped me."

Tony didn't know what led him towards his lab. Not the normal lab that he shared with Bruce. His private lab, where only Peter and himself was permitted in. He remembered when he first allowed Peter in, Peter gasping in shock, gaping at him, wondering if he had gone insane. But then he got used to it. The lab was  _their_ place. It was Peter and Tony's, and no one could take that away from them.

Maybe subconsciously or willingly, Tony didn't even know anymore, he made his way in and sat in the chair that Peter had sat in whenever they were working on a project together. On the table lay Peter's now forgotten science fair project. The board lay faced down, and all Tony saw was the white cardboard staring back at him. Without really thinking about it, he flipped it over, and opened it, exposing all of Peter's hard work.

When Tony saw what Peter was working on, he nearly cried. He thought the boy would do something simple, yet intelligent enough to win. He didn't expect this, didn't expect that Peter would spend  _hours_ researching about it. 

On the science board lay pictures, diagrams, calculations, and theories about Tony's arc reactor. Peter had made hypothesis on how it worked, how it was built, how it helped Tony. Tony picked up a piece of writing that was not yet attached to the project and started reading.

_Tony Stark's arc reactor was a genius invention built by a genius man. Without it, Tony Stark would not be here, therefore not allowing several life-altering inventions and creations to exist. The start of the arc reactor began with palladium, and then as time progressed, a second arc reactor was made. This particular arc reactor was made with the element that Tony Stark himself has discovered/created._

The paper continued to discuss the history of the arc reactor, and Tony had tears in his eyes by the time he finished it. Peter knew so damn much, and he should be able to accomplish so damn much, but he couldn't. Because Tony couldn't fucking rescue him from being tortured. Tony flipped the paper over, not being able to stand looking at Peter's praises. Tony didn't deserve them. However, there was more writing on the back. Tony frowned, the research and information was all on the front. When he read what was actually on the back, Tony let out a sob.

_Um, I'm writing this because it feels right, but they probably won't let me continue with this project if I plaster it on the board. But it feels right writing it so that's what I'm doing. Mister Stark, you won't see this. By the time I'm finished it will be glued onto the board, not visible to the eye. Not to mention, Clint would probably tease me nonstop. But just in case you do see this Mister Stark, I want you to know something. I know this is probably not the project you though I would be doing, and for a moment I though it would anger you. But I thought, "Ah, fuck it,(sorry for the language hahaha)this is something that matters to me, and it reminds me of my hero. I'm doing it," So, yeah. I did my project on your arc reactor, and I have no regrets about it. This is the invention that my hero created, that saved his life. I'm honored that I get to do this. Anyway, I would like to thank you, Mister Stark. One of the reasons I didn't want you to see or read anything about my project was because I wanted it to be a surprise, I guess. And a thank you. Thank you, Mister Stark. For everything you've done for me, supporting me and everything. So, Anthony Edward Stark, I dedicate my project to you. To my hero, to my inspiration, to the parental figure I wish I had. Thank you, Mister Stark._

Tony sank to the floor, clutching the paper in his hand tightly. Tony didn't deserve Peter, didn't deserve anything Peter said about him.

God, he just wanted Peter back. He wanted to hug his kid tightly, never letting go.

Tears poured down his face, and Tony  _broke down._ Sure he had cried, ever since Peter he's cried more than he ever has. But now he was full on  _sobbing_ ,  _gasping._ He couldn't breathe, he was crying to hard. 

He just wanted his kid back. He wanted his kid, safe and sound, talking his ear off about  _Star Wars_ conspiracy theories.

He wanted his kid, needed his kid.

Oh God, his kid.

"Tony! Oh fuck, Tony!"

Steve came running in, looking concerned. Tony barely acknowledged him, he was to focused on trying to  _calm the hell down_.

"Tony, hey Tony! You need to breathe, alright? You're having a panic attack. C'mon, Tony. Breathe with me," Steve inhaled deeply, hoping Tony would follow his example.

"P-peter, my fault, fuck, P-peter!" Tony couldn't stop sobbing, hand clutching at his chest, breathing raggedly.

"It is  _not_ your fault. Do you understand? Not your fault. That evil bastard who took Peter, it's his fault. Him and the people that are hurting him," Steve said angrily.

Tony's breathing finally calmed down, but the heavy flow of tears didn't stop. Tony turned to Steve, eyes watering. 

"T-thanks, Cap," Tony managed to say, tears still flowing, breath hitching. Steve sat down next to the distraught man, and enveloped him in a hug. 

Normally Tony would have pulled away, but not tonight.

Tonight he returned Steve's embrace, burying his face into Steve's chest, sobbing. 

**

Peter finally managed to pry his eyes open, blinking slowly.

"And he's awake! Finally, I thought you were dead," Toomes said with a smile.

" 'm sorry," mumbled Peter. Maybe if he apologized, acted humble Toomes would let him go, or tell Mister Stark to come get him, tell Mister Stark that he learned his lesson and he can come get him now.

No such luck.

"C'mon Petey, I have a new invention I want to try out!"

More? There was more? Peter almost let out a sob. He didn't know how much more he could take. He just wanted to go  _home._

"Don't worry, Peter. I won't be cutting into you or blasting things at you today. No today we are going to try out this wonderful head device. Remember Adrian's? Well I took it, and made some modifications. Let's try it out!"

 _No let's not. I would really rather fucking not_.

Toomes placed the device on his head, strapping it in place. After adjusting it, he turned it on. Peter braced himself, clenching his eyes closed waiting for the pain to come. But nothing did. Instead he heard a voice. A very familiar voice.

"Peter! I said wake the hell up!"

He snapped his eyes open, because he knew that voice. It was a voice he hadn't learned in so long, but it was a voice he was so accustomed to he would recognize it from the other side of the world. It was May's voice.

Peter shot up, realizing that he was no longer restrained. In fact he was in his... bed?

 _What the hell?_  

"Peter Benjamin Parker, if you're not out of bed NOW, I will personally drag your ass all the way to your damn school while you're still in your Iron Man boxers!"

Peter looked around, finding his clothes, marveling at how this had happened. He was sure he was back with Toomes, being tortured. What the hell was he doing home?

"Peter!"

He raced down the stairs, eager to see May again. Oh, God how he wanted to hug her, eat her disgusting rubbery pancakes.

"M-May? May where are you?"

"In the living room, hurry and grab your breakfast. You still have time," May's voice returned. 

"Oh my God, May! I missed you so much, I'm so glad-," but Peter couldn't continue. Because, yes May was there but May was being held at gunpoint. And not just May, but Mister Stark and Clint and Natasha, and everyone he fucking cared about. The Avengers were all gagged and bound, all held at gunpoint.

"M-May? Mister Stark? What the hell is going on?"

Before he could get any answers, a man stepped out of the shadows. 

Adrian Toomes.

"N-no you can't be here! You can't, you're in jail, you  _can't be here_ ," Peter gasped, backing away from him.

"Oh, but I'm here, Peter. And I'm going to make you pay for what you did," Adrian snarled.

"You can do anything you want to me, but please let them go. Let my family go!" Peter pleaded.

"Unfortunately, I can't do that as that would ruin the fun. Because this is how I'm going to hurt you, how I'm going to destroy you. You are going to shoot the Avengers, one by one until they are all dead. If not, I will kill your Aunt and then kill the Avengers," Toomes snarled.

_No. No, no, no._

"Fine, then I guess your Aunt will be the first to go," Toomes pulled out a gun and raised it to her head, not caring that there was already another man holding a gun to her head.

"No! Stop!"

"Then kill the others! It's her or them, Parker! Her or them!"

"I can't, I can't do that, just please, please, take me instead!"

"SHOOT THEM!" Toomes yelled, throwing the gun at Peter.

"Don't even think about shooting me, it will just bounce off."

He could be lying. But Peter couldn't risk it.

"I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry," Peter closed his eyes.

Raised the gun.

Aimed it at Clint.

Clint, who always helped him, made jokes with him, trained him.

Clint, who was one of the best friends he ever had.

And he fired.

"Now, the rest, Parker," Toomes snarled.

Peter fell to his knees, sobbing.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm so so sorry," Peter said, crying.

He turned his gun to Steve. 

Steve. 

And then Steve was gone.

And then Bruce. 

Natasha.

Sam.

Bucky.

And then, the gun fell on the last remaining Avenger.

Mister Stark.

"Mister Stark. I'm sorry, I'm so so so sorry, I-,"

"PARKER!"

"I'm sorry. I love you, Tony."

And with a shot from the gun, Mister Stark slumps over, dead.

Peter collapsed, sobbing.

"You actually did it. You must really love your aunt, kid. Too bad that now she's going to be gone too."

Peter's head snapped up. But before he could move, Toomes's men grabbed him.

"No! May! Let me go, you asswipes, LET ME GO!" Peter yelled, struggling but he couldn't get free.

"Peter, Peter, I love you. I'll always love you. Don't forget that," whispered May.

"No! MAY!"

But it's to late. The gun goes off and May falls.

The men release Peter, but he hardly feels it. He crawls to May, clutching her body towards his chest, willing her to breathe again.

"Poor Peter Parker. Now he has no one. No one at all," Toomes said, cackling.

Peter didn't look at him, couldn't look at him. He just kept holding May. 

"I guess it won't matter because you'll be joining them soon," Toomes says, and fast as a cobra, swiftly shoots Peter in the arm, forcing him to let go in pain.

He yelled out.

Another shot came, this time to his left leg.

Another yell.

Another shot, and now both his arms are a bleeding mess.

More yells.

Now his legs are both bleeding.

And then his abdomen.

His sides.

And then Toomes lifts the gun to his head.

"Goodbye, Peter."

The gun goes off, and Peter's eyes shut.

**

Peter's eyes snap back open. His chest heaves, and he's sobbing and yelling, and thrashing in his restraints.

He's back with Damian.

"No! No! No!" Peter yells more, trying to get the restraints off his damn body. But eventually he tires out, all adrenaline gone. All his rattling had reopened his wounds, and he was bleeding again.

Just like May, how the blood had dripped down her face. And Clint, and Nat, and Steve, and Bruce, and Bucky, and...

And Mister Stark.

"Did you have fun, Peter? I would like to tell you that was all in your head, but it wasn't. Of course, some of it was made up. But your family is all dead. Your Aunt May? Dead in a car crash. Bruce? Mixed the wrong chemicals, inhaled the wrong fumes. Natasha? She walked in on Clint practicing. Steve hit Bucky a bit to hard while training, and poor Bucky died of head trauma. Steve, overcome with guilt, committed suicide. And your precious little Mister Stark? You want to know the  _real_ reason he hasn't come to get you? After we took you, he tried so hard to get you back. Tried tracing our videos, trying to find a location. It's been two weeks now Peter. He gave up a week ago. When we sent in that last video, it was a live stream. Poor fool thought he could trace it. He couldn't. So he gave up. Overcome with guilt, he took his own life. And now? You have no one to rescue you, Peter. Everyone you love is dead. And no one's coming to get you."

Peter didn't know what to think, say, do.

He had to shoot his family, endure all of this pain and bullshit for this? To find out that his family is dead?

No. He doesn't believe it.

"Look, Peter. I have photographs of their bodies."

Toomes shows him the photos. Photos he never wants to see again. Never wanted to see in the first place.

And then he realizes.

His family is dead.

He has no one.

No one's coming to get him.

He sobs, tears falling down his cheeks.

If he wasn't broken before, he sure as hell is now.

He has nothing to live for anymore.

And he finally did what he promised himself he would not do.

He broke.

He's broken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to compromise and include both physical and psychological whump. Hope this chapter satisfies:)  
> I'm so sorry this chapter is up late, I was busy all day today and didn't get to write until late this night. Please, leave a comment on what you think:)!  
> Also, I really want more time to write and get more chapters up faster, so if I don't reply to everyone's comments, I'm really sorry, but at least you get quicker updates:)


	7. Chapter 6

He took every thing that happened to him without complaint. It might just be numbness, or the infection from his wounds finally hitting him, but he didn't react anymore. 

Every blast, every cut, Peter took it without any emotion. He accepted the pain, knew it wouldn't go away. He wasn't getting out of this hellhole anytime soon, so why make his life and Toomes's harder? 

It was much easier, he thinks, if he compliantly lays still on the metal table that was now his bed, his family, his home while Toomes did his experiments, tested out his weapons. 

It was kind of amusing, really. The weapons he despised were now his best friends. Every bite of pain that it brought to him reminded him why he's still alive, what his purpose was.

And his purpose was simple once you think about it.

He lived purely for the benefit of others. Whether that be while Peter is Spiderman, helping the people of Queens, or here on this table, assisting Toomes with his body.

_Spiderman._

His other identity seemed so far away, like a different life. His old life. 

God, he wanted his old life.

Ned, MJ, Mister Stark, May. The Avengers.

Just thinking of his family made his heart hurt.

They weren't even  _alive_.

But wait. Toomes hadn't said anything about Ned or MJ. 

Peter's heart soared.

_Ned and MJ are alive._

_**_

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN HE'S BEING TORTURED? MAY TOLD US HE GOT INTO A REALLY BAD CAR ACCIDENT!" Ned yelled.

"Look, Ned, I'm sorry. But how the hell was I supposed to tell my kid's best friend that he's being held hostage by a dick in a really ugly mustache and is being tortured? It's not exactly a great conversation starter," Mister Stark stated.

"Then why tell me now?"

"Because your his best friend. He needs you when we get him back. Now, excuse me. I need to tell young Michelle about this situation as well."

Tony walked out of Ned's apartment. He hadn't originally planned on telling any of Peter's friends what was happening to him, but they were his family too. They deserved the same.

When he got to MJ's house, her reaction was a bit different. She led him outside, where her family or eavesdropping neighbors wouldn't hear. Tony told her what's happening to Peter and where he is. MJ nodded. And then promptly slapped him.

"Why the fuck haven't you gotten him back? You're supposed to be a genius. Get him the hell back so I can kick his ass for being the self-sacrificing moron he is," MJ stated and then went back inside, flipping him off along her way.

In a way, MJ made Tony realize a lot of things. Peter had good friends looking out for him, and when he gets back they will be right there for him. And Tony did the right thing, telling MJ and Ned. That way they'll be at least somewhat prepared when they rescue Peter.

And they will rescue Peter. 

Tony just hoped he could do it soon, without Peter with him, safe and sound, Tony wouldn't be able to breathe properly ever again. 

And if he died...

that would be on him. 

**

Peter's realization of his best friends being alive brought him out of the deep end. Not enough to unbreak him, he's seen, _felt_ to much for him to be completely whole again, but it gave him a reason to live. He might not see them again, but just the mere thought of them being alive makes Peter content. Even if he can't see them, he has family. And just the thought of that makes Peter more alive. He's not okay. But it's an improvement.

He's still compliant, still strapped down. Still just a body to test things out on.

But now he was a body that had a family.

And that gave Peter enough motive to suffer through his pain, to not give up completely.

Maybe he wouldn't see them again. They were just two teenagers, they couldn't rescue him by themselves, and Peter didn't even know if they knew what predicament he was in. But they were alive. And that alone is a huge improvement to Peter's otherwise shitty situation.

**

"Tony. Tony, it's been at least three days without any videos. What if something happened to him?" May asked worriedly, wringing her hands together.

Normally Tony would have responded with, "I'm sure he's fine, May. Maybe they just have really shitty connection."

But he couldn't. Because he didn't know if Peter was fine.

As much as he hated those videos, he could see Peter, see that he was still alive. He could asses his injuries, making note of them.

Now he doesn't even know if he's alive.

Tony shook his head. Of course Peter is alive.

And just when he was about to go embrace May, tell her that they were going to get their boy back, he received a notification. It was a new video.

**

 _"I know, it's been a while since I last sent a video. Don't worry, your Spiderling is still alive. If you can call his state "living", but whatever. He's breathing. Listen here, Stark. I only have a few more inventions left. Maybe enough for another week, maybe shorter. After I'm finished, I will send you coordinates of our location. You won't catch us though. Me and my crew will be far away from young Parker before you can even dream of catching us. But I'm not doing this to help you. I'm doing this to hurt you. This child, he's broken. Barley functioning. Your punishment is realizing that you can take him back, but you'll never have him back. He's not going to be the same, Stark. His life, your life, will never be the same again. Just like you did with my life, tearing everything away, and what the boy did to my son. So Stark. Hang tight. You can rescue your precious little Peter in a few day's time. But he won't be the Peter you love."_  

Tony couldn't breathe. Toomes was just going to hand Peter over? And what he said about Peter being broken... what had he done to him in the last three days?

No matter what he said in the video though, Toomes was going to die. Tony didn't give a flying fuck if Toomes wasn't going to be there, he would find him. And when he did he would kill him. Oh but not with a gun, or something simple like that. That was too simple, too painless. No, he's going to tear him apart limb from limb, beat him. Because God help him if he lets his kid's torturer just go. No, he will pay.

Tony closed his eyes, and a tear escaped his eyes. It might take a little time, but he would get Peter back.

And Toomes would die for all that he did to his kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's super short, I know. Sorry, but I wanted to get this up. I decided to add Ned and MJ to the story, as it was requested, but I also think they will be a vital part of Peter's healing process. You'll see more of them in the next few chapters:)


	8. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Beatings, Psycholgical torture

He opened his eyes slowly. His body felt like he was on fire, his head was throbbing, and he was really fucking sore.

"Hiya, Pete. We're down to our last three devices and weapons. After this, I don't have any more to test out. I might kill you, I might not. It all depends on your behavior, Petey. Maybe someone will find you eventually. Who knows? But for right now, we have tests to make and complete."

Peter couldn't believe what he was hearing.

" 'fter this, you're leavin'? I'm gon'a be free?" Peter slurred, eyes wide.

"Well, that's if I don't kill you. And no, not free necessarily. But no more torture, no more tests. Maybe someone will even find you. But I'm not unstrapping you from the table."

It was better than nothing. Peter couldn't believe it. There was no way this could be happening. 

But then his hopes sank. 

No one is going to come get them because no one was alive. No one who could help him, anyway. 

Peter sagged back into the table, tears leaking out of his eyes. Toomes watched his reaction with amusement.

"Well, anyway let's get started. You're gonna be a good boy, right Peter?"

But Toomes wasn't looking for an answer. He just shrugged away from the boy on the table, picking up a syringe. In it lay a transparent blue liquid. Without a second thought, Toomes brutally brought down the needle into Peter's arm.

For a hot minute, nothing happened. 

And then Peter saw the lights. They were too fucking bright. He couldn't close his eyes, he was forced to keep them open. Peter's eyes watered, but he couldn't close them, couldn't blink his tears away.

Then a loud, piercing scream entered his ears. It wouldn't stop. Peter was going to cry. Everything was so damn loud, to fucking bright. 

And then Toomes tightened his restraints.

Peter screamed. It hurt so much, he could feel the straps digging into him, could feel every bit of the itchy leather. Could feel every single abnormality on the table.

"This serum causes sensory overload. Of course, you Peter, already have heightened senses so it must be so much more worse for you," Toomes said loudly.

Peter let out another scream. Toomes's voice was so loud, everything was to loud. He could hear to much, and the lights, why were they so fucking bright?

"Poor Peter Parker. So much pain, and I'm not even touching you."

Peter let out a groan, then regretted it as it made his head hurt even more.

"I think we should change that."

And then Toomes started beating him.

"Peter Parker. You're father figure ruined my life and you ruined my son's. The apple really doesn't fall far from the tree. No, I got to torture you. Got to hear your screams. But I haven't really beaten you before, with my bare hands. And now I can," Toomes breathed, raining down punches on Peter. 

He screamed. It was like someone was shooting him, shooting his arms, his face, his stomach. 

Toomes didn't stop there. 

"Who were you to decide that you can just fuck up a life like that?" Toomes demanded in between punches.

"Who were you, a fifteen year old  _child_ to decide that my son should go to prison, to decide that he couldn't see his family?"

"Who were you to ruin EVERYTHING he has ever planned?"

"This is why Tony didn't try to rescue you! Because you RUIN EVERYTHING! First you ruined my son's life and now you're slowly ruining Tony's! THIS IS ALL BECAUSE OF YOU!"

Peter sobbed, but Toomes didn't care. He kept yelling, kept punching. Peter thought he was going to implode.

More punches rained down on him, and Peter thought he was going to die. 

It hurt so much. 

His whole body was bruised and bloody, but Toomes kept punching. 

Each punch was like a stab wound, and he was surprised that he wasn't dead at this point.

Toomes was breathing heavily by the time he decided to stop. 

Peter was almost unrecognizable. Not a spot on his thin, frail body wasn't bruised. His face was purple and blue, and his body was just littered with bruises.

The repetitive attack on his body reopened many of his wounds, and he was now bleeding. He moaned, the feeling of the blood trickling down his arm felt like he was being whipped. 

And then it stopped.

Peter sobbed with relief, and then regretting it extremely when the movement jarred his body, causing him even more pain.

But the sensory overload was over.

Oh, but Peter wasn't safe. He couldn't rest. No, now Toomes brought out another device. It looked weirdly similar to the one he had put on him yesterday, the one where he had to see his family die.

Peter choked back a sob. 

_Not again, not again, please._

Toomes, noticing Peter's expression, smirked.

"Don't worry, it's a different one," he promised.

So it would be worse. Toomes didn't directly voice the thought, but he knew. It was going to be so much worse.

Toomes leaned over Peter, attaching the device onto Peter's head and turned it on.

Peter screamed. He didn't know what this was, but it hurt. It hurt so much. 

And then all his fear, his injuries, his pain, came crashing down on him, magnified by a thousand.

He relived all his worst moments.

Uncle Ben lay dying in his arms.

Then he was being crushed under a building.

Mister Stark, taking the suit back from him.

He was back on Titan.

And then all off his experiences with Damian Toomes came crashing down on him.

Every blow, shot, cut, stab, shock came back stronger than ever.

And it hurt.

God, it hurt so fucking much.

Every worst moment, all happening again but worse. Oh God, it was so much worse.

And then every fear he ever had came crashing down.

Every worst scenario he ever imagined, all his worries, fears, phobias, it all came raining down.

May kicked him out. Said she couldn't take care or stand his Spiderman antics anymore. He begged, pleaded for her to let him back in.

No dice. He couldn't get back in.

And then Mister Stark materialized in front of him.

"Goddamn it, Parker! I told you, don't mess up! And what do you do, you fuck it up? I'm taking back the suit. And you're kicked off the team. This isn't working out. What was I thinking, recruiting a fifteen year old kid?"

Peter sobbed.

"No, Mister Stark! I can do better, I will do better!" Peter pleaded.

But Mister Stark wouldn't budge. 

And it happened again, over and over again, but with different Avengers.

First, Sam. Then Clint. Bucky. Steve. Nat. Bruce.

Peter collapsed, sobbing.

And then he woke up, still sobbing. But this time he couldn't move, he was back on the table.

"One more, Petey. You can do this, c'mon."

It was a gun this time. Peter closed his eyes. He can do this, it was just one more.

Toomes shot him.

And it wasn't what Peter was expecting. He expected pain.

And it came. But it was so much. He didn't think it would be this bad.

But it was horrible.

The pain was blinding. It was every single painful moment he ever experienced, all combined into one single blast.

And Peter screamed. Screamed like he never screamed before. It was horrible and all he could feel was the pain.

Peter panted, trying to breathe. But he couldn't, he was so tired.

"Look, Peter we finished! You can rest now," Toomes said.

And then he injected him with something, and Peter's world went dark.

**

" _Guess what, Stark? We finished. You can come get your Spiderling now. Here's the address. Don't try to find us. You won't succeed."_

And Tony jumped. They were gonna get his kid back.

"We got Peter's location! We got him! Let's go get our boy back!"

The Avengers have never flown out of the compound faster.


	9. Chapter 8

Tony wanted the Quinjet to go faster. So, so, so much faster. But it was already going the fastest that it could, and Bucky was already really pushing it. Instead of all the Avengers flying/driving to where Peter was being held separately, they had decided that they would take the Quinjet, considering how much faster it went in comparison to Tony's suit. Bruce had  stayed behind, saying that he would help Cho set up, get ready for Peter. Natasha had stayed with May and Ned and MJ, who had decided to come and see Peter when he came back. And they insisted that they could handle it, that they  _needed_ to see Peter. But maybe they wouldn't because the damn viechle was moving so  _fucking slow._

Sure it was  _faster_ but it wasn't fast enough. Not nearly fast enough, because Tony wasn't fucking there yet. 

Tony just closed his eyes and hoped he would get there soon.

**

Tony had nearly died when he read the location of where Peter was being held. He was so fucking close. How had he not gotten him?

It was Adrian's old workshop. Peter was literally located so close to Tony and he hadn't realized it.

_Stupid Tony._

_**_

"Tony! Wake up man, we have a kid to rescue remember?" Clint said, but not unkindly. There was only worry in his eyes.8

Tony couldn't believe that he had fallen asleep. His kid needed him and he had fallen asleep. 

"Tony. You've been up for days, man. It's understandable that you would sleep. Besides, we aren't here yet. We're still maybe five minutes out, I just thought it would be better if we rescued Peter with a functioning Tony Stark," Clint said, a small smile on his lips.

And then it hit him. They were really going to rescue Peter.

"We're landing!"

_Time to get his kid the hell back._

**

No way was it going to be that easy. No guards, no security, nothing. But Tony still felt a rush of panic when he couldn't see Peter. Where the hell was his kid? 

"Tony! Over here!"

Steve was gesturing to a door that had been covered by crates.

Tony ran like he never ran before, meeting Steve at the door. He didn't say anything to him though, casting him a small nod to express his gratitude before barging in.

Tony paused before he ran down the stairs that led down though. What if Peter wasn't alive?

Tony shook the thought out of his head, and ran down the stairs. There was another door at the bottom.

**

The door was blasted open, Tony didn't want to waste any time if it was locked. 

To his surprise, the lights were on. And in the center of the room was Peter, strapped down to the metal table. 

_Peter._

He was gone for a month, and Tony had gotten him back. But first he had to let him down. He quickly ran over to the table, eyebrows creasing in worry when he saw that the kid wasn't awake. He quickly checked for a pulse, breathing in relief when he found one.

"Tony, we need to get him off,  _now,"_ Steve said, leaning over Peter to undo the restraints that confined him to the cool, harsh table.

"Oh, god," Steve breathed, eyes growing wide when he saw the severity of Peter's injuries. 

Tony couldn't move, couldn't breathe.

Peter was covered in bruises, drenched with his own blood. Tony choked back a sob when he saw Peter's wrists. After Steve let them free, there was nothing to cover the damage that had been done to them. They were rubbed raw, covered in blood. It was obvious that Peter had tried to escape, and ultimately failed.

With one last grunt, Steve undid the last leather restraint.

Peter rolled towards Tony, he had nothing to support him now that the straps were gone.

Tony caught him when he fell, growing even more concerned when he felt how hot the kid was, and how  _light_. A fifteen year old shouldn't be this fucking light, but Peter was.

Tony grew even more concerned when Peter wouldn't open his eyes. His head lolled to his chest, completely unresponsive. 

"Peter? Peter, come on. Wake up, kid. Wake up," Tony whispered, running a hand through Peter's hair. He almost threw up when he saw all the blood that was matted on it.

Peter wouldn't wake up.

"Tony, we got to go. The sooner we get Peter to Bruce and Cho the better," Steve murmured. Without another word, Tony stood up, his kid in his arms, and walked back to the Quinjet where the rest of the team was.

Tony and Steve placed Peter down on the ground gently where Sam could examine him. He was the only one with some medical knowledge, and Tony prayed to the heavens above that Peter would be okay.

"Oh shit. This is bad," Sam gasped, his eyes traveling up and down Peter's body.

The Quinjet started taking off, and the movement must have been jarring enough to wake Peter up, because he slowly opened his eyes. Or tried to, they were so swollen that Tony was surprised that he could even twitch them.

"W-wh' goin' on? Where am I?" Peter groaned, and then groaned out in pain.

"Peter! Oh my god, you're awake! Are you okay? I mean of course you're not fucking okay, but it's going to get better, okay Pete? We're gonna get you to Bruce and Cho, and they're gonna make you feel better, I promise," rambled Tony.

Peter blinked sluggishly. Then he seemed to realize the people next to him.

_Steve. Sam. Clint._

And, most importantly-

"M'str Star'?" he slurred.

But no, the man in front of him holding his hand couldn't be Mister Stark because Mister Stark was dead. He had seen the body, there was no way that Mister Stark was sitting in front of him right now clutching his hand tightly. His head couldn't be on Mister Stark's lap because Mister Stark was dead.

Peter squeezed his eyes shut again, because as much as he wanted to see Mister Stark again, he wouldn't fall for this trap, this illusion again. 

"No, Peter, you've got to keep your eyes open, okay? I know it hurts, but you need to keep your eyes open. Please, Peter." begged Tony. Or not Tony. Dream Tony. Because this wasn't real, and as much as Peter wanted it to be, it wasn't real.

"Get out of my head," mumbled Peter,

"No, Peter, you're free now. You're with us now, and you're safe, and we'll take care of you. This isn't a dream," Dream Tony said, and it sounded like he was crying.

"Get out of my head. You've done enough to me, you can't make me see him again. I can't lose him again, I can't. I can't, I can't, I can't," Peter said forcefully.

"Peter, this isn't a dream. I'm here. And so is Steve, Sam, Clint. Bucky's navigating this thing, and May and Nat and your friends are waiting for you back home. We finally got you, Pete. You're going home."

And Peter wanted so badly to believe him. But he can't. He can't listen to this Dream Tony. He's just going to get crushed all over again. And Peter can't deal with Mister Stark's death again.

"Get out. Get out of my head, get out, get out get out," he says, trying to tug his hand out of Dream Tony's hand, move his head out of his lap.

"Just leave me alone. Please? You've done enough to me. Just leave me alone," Peter mutters, still trying to tug his hand out of Dream Tony's grip.

"I can't, I can't deal with this again. Please just leave me alone. Please," and now Peter's begging. He can't do this, he can't do it.

Tony sobs when Peter tugs his hand out from his grip, and cries even harder when Peter begs him to leave him alone. But he can't get his head off of Tony's lap, it's too comfortable and he doesn't have the energy to rearrange his whole body. And, although it was a horrible situation, Tony was glad that Peter didn't have the energy to move, because if he moved away from Tony completely, Tony would lose Peter again. And he couldn't lose his kid again. But no matter what he says or does, Peter doesn't believe him. He won't believe that he's safe now. And that makes Tony sob, because Peter was safe, he was with his family but the kid wouldn't believe it. And that hurt Tony more than anything he's ever experienced before.

Toomes hadn't been lying when he said that Peter was broken.

He also wasn't lying when he said it would hurt Tony.

Because right now, in this moment, with his son's broken head on his lap, he has never been more hurt.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hella short, I know. Sorry. But hey Peter's rescued:)  
> Next chapter should be longer, and with more angst. Leave a comment on what you think?  
> Don't worry, all you whump lovers. We still have a long way to go:)


	10. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning:description of a seizure

"Peter. I'm sorry kid, but you can't fall asleep. We're almost there, and hopefully you'll feel better, but you got to keep your eyes open. Can you do that?"

And Peter knows that he needs to. With all the head injuries he has, it wouldn't be very smart of him to fall asleep. He might not wake up. But on the other hand, the person speaking to him  _wasn't real._ Peter didn't want to get hurt again, couldn't handle his family being ripped away from him  _again._

But this is a dream. It won't matter if he doesn't wake up again because it's a dream. And yeah, it will suck when he's not on Mister Stark's lap anymore, not having his gentle fingers run through his hair. But he doesn't want to hurt again. So he closes his eyes, hoping the dream goes away.

He won't be able to heal if he stays longer. Staying in this fantasy-wonderful as it is-will only destroy him emotionally quicker. He's barely hanging on as it is, he can't risk it for a quick dream.

And then the world goes black, hopefully taking away the dream with him.

He welcomes the black with open arms.

**

Of fucking course Peter falls into unconsciousness. He was never one to listen to Tony. 

His fear increases even more when Peter won't wake back up. Tony shakes him, yells his name.

Not a single reaction.

And then Peter starts seizing.

"Oh my god! Sam! Do something!" Tony yells.

"I can't! There's no equipment to help stabilize him!" Sam says worriedly, fear evident in his eyes.

 White foam starts coming out of Peter's mouth, and he seizes even harder.

"Peter! Kid!"

But they can't do anything. There is absolutely nothing that any of them can do.

But then Peter stops moving, and he's finally still, but he's too still. Something wasn't right.

"He's flat lining! Tony, move out of the way!"

Tony wants to, but he's frozen with shock. It's not until Steve shoves him out of the way until it registers in his mind that _Peter isn't breathing_.

"Fuck! Goddamn it, Peter! Breathe!" Sam shouted, doing CPR on the limp body. 

Tony tries to get to Peter, he needs to be with him because that's his kid on the floor, his kid that wasn't breathing. But Steve holds him back, won't let him go to Peter.

"Fuck you, Steve! That's my kid that's dying, let me the fuck go!" Tony demands, still struggling to get to Peter. 

Steve doesn't budge, just tightens his grip on Tony. 

"STEVE! LET ME GO!"

But Steve doesn't.

Sam's still trying to bring Peter back, but it's been so long. 

Just when he's about to lose hope, Peter gasps, and starts coughing rapidly.

"Peter!" Steve finally lets Tony go, and Tony scrambles to get to Peter. 

"Peter! Oh my god, Peter!" 

And Peter leans his head back into the cool metal ground, chest heaving, still breathing heavily.

"Think I'ma stay awake now," Peter mumbles.

**

So Peter was back. His eyes had opened, and he was back. And Mister Stark was sitting down next to him, looking at him with worry, his hand on Peter's chest.

"Are you really here? With me? You're real?" Peter whispers, and for the first time he wants it to be real. He wants this moment to be real. He wants Mister Stark to be real.

Mister Stark lets out a laugh, but his eyes are clouded with tears.

"Yeah, Pete. I'm real. I'm here, and you're gonna be okay," he promises.

Peter's eyes cloud over with tears, and they flow down his cheeks. 

"Peter! What's wrong? Where does it hurt?" Tony demands.

"You're real. You're really here," Peter says, and then he starts sobbing.

"You're here, you're here, you're here," Peter repeats, and he crawls towards Mister Stark, needing to be closer.

Mister Stark doesn't even hesitate, he scoops Peter up in his arms and says, "I'm here. And I'm never letting you go."

Peter sobs, clutching at his chest.

"You're real, you're real."

_Mister Stark was alive, and holding him, very much alive, very much real, and most importantly, he was here._

_And he wasn't going to leave._

_**_

Peter doesn't move from where he is, doesn't try to squirm his way out of Tony's grip. He was gazing into Mister Stark's eyes, and even though he was hurting  _everywhere_ he has never been happier.

He was lying in Mister Stark's arms, smiling, because he was safe. His family was okay, and he was going home.

He wasn't okay. Okay wouldn't happen for a while. 

But his family was with him, and they would support him throughout everything.

And for now, that's all that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, it's hella short. But I wanted to write something for you guys, so this happened. Leave a comment?  
> Don't worry. This isn't the last whump moment. I'm sure there will be more in the future:)


	11. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: description of a seizure, descriptions of a future medical procedure(just in case!)

To Tony's relief, Peter didn't fall asleep again. Even better was the fact that he hadn't tried to remove himself from Tony's embrace, if anything the kid had held on tighter. But Tony could see it in Peter's eyes. He was hurting. Of course he was, what not with the extensive bruising, all the cuts. The head wounds. Tony could see how hard Peter was struggling to stay awake, and occasionally his eyes would slip close only to snap back open again.

The eyes worried Tony. Of course, Peter's whole body looked like shit right now, but his _eyes_. They weren't the happy, hopeful eyes that Tony had grow accustomed to. They were eyes that had seen to much, felt to much. 

As much as Tony wanted to deny it, they were the eyes of a broken kid. There was no getting past it, Peter wasn't Peter right now. He's been through to much to be Peter Parker.

Peter Parker was a teenager who attended high school and built Legos with his best friend.

Peter Parker wasn't the kid in front of Tony Stark, wasn't the kid who was bleeding out on his mentor's lap.

And as much as Tony wanted his kid to be  _that_ version of Peter, he wasn't.

But Tony would fix it. Peter would be okay, and soon enough he'll be  _that_ Peter. 

All he needed was time.

**

Everything hurt. Any movement Peter made, it hurt. Hell, even fucking breathing hurt him.

Mister Stark was looking at him with worry. Peter didn't blame him. If their roles were switched, Peter would be bawling, begging for Mister Stark to be okay. 

But Peter didn't like that look in Mister Stark's eyes. There was so much worry, so much fear.

Peter didn't deserve for someone to care about him that much, not when he had made so many mistakes, so many errors. 

He was beyond grateful, he was beyond thrilled that Mister Stark and the rest of the Avengers came for him, but he felt a twinge of guilt. They had taken time out of their day to rescue a fifteen year old kid. Peter was Spiderman, he should have been able to escape on his own. But he couldn't, because he was  _weak._  

And now, the Avengers would have to deal with a broken kid.

**

"Hey, Pete. We're here now. We're gonna get you help, okay?" Tony whispered, caressing Peter's face.

"Don' go," Peter mumbled, hand reaching out to find Tony's.

Tony's hand immediately reached out to grasp his kid's, gripping it tightly between his own.

"I'm not leaving, Peter. Don't worry, I'll be here the whole time. But we need to go, we need to get you help."

"Th'nk you, M'str St'rk," Peter slurred, eyes closing.

"Hey, Peter. Eyes open, okay? Just until we stabilize you, and then you can sleep," Tony said worriedly.

Peter opened his eyes sluggishly.

" 'm sorry," he mumbled.

"No need to apologize, just keep them open, okay? Just so that I know you're awake," Tony turned his head toward Steve. 

"We need to get him to Bruce and Cho,  _now_."  

**

Thankfully, Bruce and Cho were ready for them when the Quinjet landed, a gurney waiting for Peter between the two.

Tony picked Peter up, still marveling worriedly about how light and hot he was.

"They're gonna make you feel better, okay Pete? You're gonna be fine," Tony promised, carrying him over to Bruce and Cho. Peter just blinked slowly, head lolling against Tony's chest. He didn't react to anything until he was set down on the gurney.

"Don' go," Peter pleaded, eyes watering.

"I'm not leaving, Pete. But you gotta let Bruce and Cho take care of you," Tony replied.

Bruce cast Tony a worried glance.

"Cho, we need to get him to the med bay  _now._ "

**

"Shit!"

Tony jumped up from where he was sitting.

"What the hell happened? What's wrong?"

"Banner, get Smiths and Johnson in here now! And tell them to bring their whole team, stat!"

"What the fuck is happening? Bruce!"

But Bruce ignored Tony, rushing out of the med bay as if he was on fire.

"Cho-,"

"Goddamn it, Stark!"

"What the hell is going on? What's wrong with Peter?" Tony demanded, eyes blazing.

"The x-rays came back. And it's not good, Tony. You see all these cuts all over his arms and legs? They are there because metal is lodged in each one of them. There are thousands of bits of metal stuck in this boy, and I need to get them the hell out so  _move out of my way!"_ Cho practically screamed at him.

Tony didn't even process what she had said after the bit about metal being lodged inside of Peter. All he could think about was all the cuts on Peter's body. 

There were so many, _and metal was lodged inside of each of them._

 

Tony just nodded, and took a seat next to Peter, gripping his hand tightly.

Peter turned his head slightly to look at Tony.

"Hurts," he cried

Tony's heart shattered.

"I know kid, I know. But Bruce and the doctors here are gonna make you feel better, okay?"

"No. M'str St'rk. S'mthin's wrong," Peter slurred, eyes clenched with pain. "S'mthin's r'ly wr'ng."

And then, for the second time of the day, Peter seized, just as Bruce and the other doctors came rushing in.

"Banner, we need to stabilize him before he flat lines! Get the oxygen mask! Smiths, Johnson, hold him down!"

Tony can't breathe. Peter was seizing again, and he had said that something hurts, that something was wrong. 

Now, he was seizing again and Tony can't do a  _single fucking thing_.

**

They had stabilized him, thankfully.

But now they had to find out what was wrong, what made Peter react that way, what was hurting him.

They ran a CAT scan, hoping that it will reveal the answers they needed.

Luckily, it did.

Unluckily, it was not good news.

Toomes, the evil bastard, had put an intrathecal spinal pump inside of Peter.

Every ten minutes, one of his toxins would be injected into Peter, directly into his spinal fluid.

Tony couldn't breathe.

If he wasn't planning on killing Toomes before, he sure as hell was now.

And hell hath no fury on the likes of Damian Toomes.

**

"Pete. Hey. We have to do surgery on you, okay? There's something in you that we need to get out. And it's going to hurt like a bitch, but we have to do this," Tony said apologetically, running his hand through Peter's hair.

"L'ngu'ge," Peter replied shakily, fumbling for Tony's hand.

Tony let out a shaky laugh, gripping Peter's hand tightly.

"I'm here, okay? And I'm not leaving you,"

Peter's head rolled against the pillow, eyes closing.

"Peter?" Tony asked, worry evident in his eyes.

"Mm, 'm 'wake," Peter replied sluggishly.

"Can you keep your eyes open, Pete? Just so that I know that you're awake."

It hurt, but Peter managed to keep his eyes open, squeezing Tony's hand tightly.

"m'kay." 

"Stark," Cho gestured for him.

"We have to restrain him. I guarantee you he's going to move around, and we can't risk us messing up. This is his spine we're dealing with."

"No. We can't do that. He just spent a month restrained to a metal table. How do you think he's going to react when he's restrained again?"

"Stark. We have no choice. It's either that or we risk paralysis. And I'm not risking that."

Tony exhaled heavily, briefly closing his eyes.

"Okay. Okay."

He walked over to Peter and grabbed his head again.

"Pete. We're gonna have to move you okay? And they have to restrain you so you don't hurt yourself, but don't worry. I'm going to be right here, and you'll be perfectly safe, okay?"

"'kay."

The doctors picked Peter up and carried him across the hall where he would have to into surgery. They laid him down on the cool table, turning him on his side so that they could access his back, and then strapping him in. As soon as the wrist restraint was attached, Tony held Peter's hand again.

"You're gonna be okay, Peter. I got you. It'll be over soon," Tony promised while the doctors set everything up.

"Tony, we're gonna get started, now. I would advise against looking."

Tony took a deep breath and looked down on Peter.

"You're gonna be fine," he promised.

_He's going to be fine._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no regrets. May and all of Peter's friends will be seeing Peter again in the next chapter, or maybe the one after that, so no worries. Angst for everyone, all around!  
> Leave a comment? They make my day:)


	12. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Medical Procesures without painkillers

Tony had promised that Peter would be fine. That it would all be okay.

Now, Tony wasn't so sure.

The universe must really fucking hate Tony Stark and Peter Parker because it seemed pretty adamant on making his life pretty fucking complicated. Nothing would ever be easy, and certainly not right now.

**

"Shit! Shit, shit, SHIT!"

"What's wrong?" Tony jumped up, startled.

"His body won't accept the sedation! I'm injecting it in, but he won't fall asleep!"

"How the hell is that even possible? We gave him painkillers and medication before, they always worked. Hell, Toomes had injected him with countless-," and Tony trailed off in horror.

"FRIDAY? Did that devil reincarnate fucking bitch inject my kid with something that could make him unresponsive to painkillers and things like that?" but Tony knew the answer before FRIDAY even responded.

"It appears that Mr. Parker has been injected with some sort of serum that makes his metabolism run even quicker than normal, therefore making him burn through medication and such. The pump will release another round of the serum inside Mr. Parker's body in five minutes," FRIDAY informed them.

"Goddamn it! There's no way I can possibly operate him without medication!"

"Ju' do it. I ca' h'ndle it," Peter whimpered, "I've been through w'rse."

Peter's voice startled Tony.

"Pete, are you sure? It's going to be horrible without painkillers. You'll be awake and...," Tony couldn't finish. They were going to remove a fucking piece of whatever the fuck it was in Peter's spine, and he would be awake.

"M'ybe p'ss out," Peter mumbled tiredly.

"Can he do that? You were going to put him to sleep anyway, right?" Tony asked Cho worriedly.

"I don't know. We were going to make him pass out medically, then wake him up medically. Passing out from the pain.. that might complicate things," Cho said worriedly.

"FRIDAY?

"I would advise against it, sir. With the medical sedatives, you had a guaranteed chance to bring him back. Falling into unconsciousness in Mr. Parker's condition risks brain damage, the chance of being comatose, or dead."

Tony can't risk Peter's death. Not when he just got him back.

"Wait. That's another problem. The pump releases the serum every ten min-"

As if on cue, Peter started moaning in pain as the serum rushed through him.

"Peter!" 

Tony raced to Peter's side, gripping his hand tightly.

"We're getting this thing out of you okay? You'll be fine."

 _You'll be fine_.

It was a phrase Tony was starting to hate. 

Peter let out a groan.

"M'str St'rk," he gasped, "h'rts," Peter clenched his eyes tightly.

"I know, Pete. But we're gonna take it out, and then you're gonna feel better, okay?"

Peter just groaned out again as another wave of pain hit him.

"Bruce. Any ideas? How the hell are we supposed to operate on him if the pump lets out another round every ten minutes?"

Bruce looked pained when he answered.

"We just have to. There's no way around it, we'll have to operate on Peter with the little shit in him."

**

Peter was crushing Tony's hand. Tony had offered it to him when they started the procedure, and Peter took it. But now he was crushing it.

Tony was running his free hand through Peter's hair, offering words of comfort to the teenager in front of him.

Peter let out a loud, heartbreaking scream when the surgeons made a particularly deep cut.

Tony clenched his eyes shut and gripped Peter's hand harder, if that was even possible.

The surgeons themselves, especially Bruce, looked at Peter with pain in their eyes before resuming.

"I got eyes on the pump. Be really careful now, if I fuck this up the boy could be paralyzed. Tony, you'll need to hold him still," Cho said determinedly.

Tony gazed into Peter's pained, tear filled eyes.

"Pete, there about to get it out okay? Cho has to be really careful, so you can't move. I'm going to hold you just in case."

Tony reached over and held his kid tightly, making sure his grip was tight, and that his hands weren't in the way of Cho's working space.

"Okay, I'm going in. Peter, I'm sorry, but this is going to hurt like a bitch."

And with that, Cho went in deeper.

Peter screamed, tears dripping down his face. Tony gripped Peter even harder, trying to provide Peter any comfort he could.

**

The screaming continued for another two hours.

When it was finally over, Peter was stitched back up and gently laid down onto his back, the restraints removed. He let out a small groan as his back made contact with the cool table.

Tony had tears in his own eyes. He had just seen his kid sliced open, and he couldn't do a damn thing about it.

"Okay, now we have the metal embedded in him to deal with," Cho murmured in a tired voice.

After what just happened to him, Peter was to tired to scream again. The pain was surprisingly easy to deal with compared to his back surgery.

It took the doctors another two hours to get rid of all the metal that was in Peter. That's how much there was inside of him. Tony wanted to throw up just thinking about it.

Peter, for the most part, was pretty out of it, only letting an occasional groan escape him. When everything was finished, he got more stitches and then was bandaged again. Everyone except Cho and Bruce had left, wanting to leave Peter and Tony alone.

"Tony. He's going to be okay," Bruce said upon looking at the distraught man next to him.

"Yeah, I know," Tony whispered, tears falling down his cheeks, still gripping Peter's hand.

"The serum will wear off in an hour, and then he can be on painkillers," Cho said quietly.

"Until then, don't let him fall asleep."

**

It was hard. Peter's eyes kept slipping, kept closing.

But Mister Stark was there to remind him, and the pain. The pain kept him awake. He would have loved nothing more than to fall asleep and escape the pain for a while but he can't. The pain kept him awake, reminding him that he can't fall asleep. It was throbbing, scratching, bruising, stabbing. But it kept him awake, so Peter embraced the pain.

"Only ten more minutes, Pete. Then you can sleep, 'kay?" Mister Stark assured him quietly.

Peter just nodded, too tired to do much else.

**

Cho came in when Peter's hour was up.

"Hey, kiddo. I have some painkillers for you, they should help," Cho said softly.

_Finally._

Tony gave Peter's hand a squeeze and offered a small smile.

"You're gonna feel better now, Pete. You can finally rest."

"s'nds nice," Peter mumbled, fixing his grip on Tony's hand.

Cho reached over and gently inserted an IV into Peter's arm.

Tony ran his fingers through Peter's hair.

"You can rest now, kiddo. You're safe."

Peter offered the man a small smile and closed his eyes, finally allowing his tired body to rest.

And for once, it looked like everything would be okay. Tony smiled at his kid's sleeping form and continued to run his fingers through Peter's hair.

"You're safe now."

At this point, Tony didn't know if he was assuring himself or Peter's small body. But for now, Peter was with him, he was safe, and he was going to recover.

And that's all that mattered.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, from here on out it's all going to be angst. Maybe the occasional fluff here and there.  
> May and everyone else will be seeing Peter in the next chapter. Oh shitt, who's ready? ;)


	13. Chapter 12

May looked at her child's sleeping body. It was almost peaceful. If it weren't for the countless bruises and bandages covering his body, she might have believed that Peter was perfectly fine. She smiled sadly, holding Peter's hand in her own. He was going to be okay, May would make sure of it.

God, her kid looked so small. So young.

Definitely to young to be sporting such injuries. He should be in school, with his friends. Being a normal teenager. 

A few tears trickled down May's cheeks.

She prayed her kid would be okay. 

No matter what, May would be there for Peter. So she stayed with him for hours, running a hand through his hair, squeezing his hand whenever he made a noise of discomfort. Because that's what good parents do. 

There was no doubting that May wasn't an amazing parent. 

She stayed with Peter. Until the very, very end, she would stay with him.

**

Ned and MJ got to see Peter a few times. The very first time they were scared. Like really fucking terrified, seeing Peter's body that was being swallowed by machines and tubes and wires.

But like good friends they stayed with him.

There was this time when Ned and MJ had stayed with him, talking to him even though they knew he wouldn't respond. They told him stories about what was happening at school, the latest decathlon events. They stayed up with him until they fell asleep, and even then they didn't leave. They fell asleep in Peter's room, sleeping with him. 

May and Tony had gotten up and went into Peter's room that day, looking at the sleeping teenagers, their chests rising and falling evenly. Breathing at the same time.

It was times like these when May and Tony both were really fucking grateful that Peter had great friends.

Ned let out a particularly loud snore, and May laughed when Peter's body shifted a bit, like he could tell that Ned was there.

"Shut up," mumbled MJ sleepily, poking Ned in the arm.

Yeah, they weren't leaving Peter any time soon.

**

Peter slept for a while. Normally, Tony would have been worried but he wasn't. Cho had assured Tony that Peter would open his eyes soon. He just needed time, that's all. So Tony wasn't worried. He looked at Peter's young face. He looked so young. But it was impaired by the myriad of bruises, and that alone made Tony's heart ache. A face that young, that pure shouldn't be covered with that many bruises.

No, Tony was worried. Screw everything.

He was super worried.

His kid was asleep, but with all the bruises, the bandages, the scars? He looked dead.

He was so pale, so thin, so small.

Tony was very worried, actually. Whatever the hell Cho tried to tell him, he barely registered it. Sure he heard it, but he needed more. When Peter wakes up, Tony would be satisfied. When he was really, truly safe. 

Whenever Peter made the smallest noise of pain, of discomfort, Tony immediately placed his hand over Peter's heart, his other hand going through Peter's hair. He felt comfort hearing Peter's heartbeat. Every beat reminded him that Peter is alive. That he was breathing. 

_Beat_

Peter's alive.

_Beat_

Peter's breathing.

_Beat_

Peter's gonna wake up.

_Beat_

Peter's gonna be okay.

And so it continued, Tony taking comfort with the sound of every beat of Peter's heart. 

**

The Avengers also visited Peter often.

Whenever Tony, May, Ned, or MJ wasn't with him, one of the Avengers were.

Bruce visited often, checking up on Peter regularly to make sure everything else was okay. He would add things to his IV, then ruffle Peter's hair. He would always whisper, "Get better Peter. We're all here for you," then leave.

Nat would sit down next to Peter, looking at the young boy sleep peacefully. She would tell Peter stories of her time as a spy, things she have seen. Occasionally, she would even outline future training sessions with Peter. Whenever she was finished telling a story she would wish him to get better, and give his hand a little squeeze. She would always assure Peter that the next time they train together, she was going to kick his ass. She would smile down at him ruefully and say, "Get better kid. You have so much to live for. Plus I still have to kick your spider ass for that one time you beat me. Don't think that I'll forget."

Sam visited often, too. He had grown attached to Peter, despite the impression that he was just a puny kid. But Peter had impacted Sam's life, and he was glad the kid was in it. He would poke at Peter's pale arm teasingly then say, "Come on runt. Up and at 'em, we still need to prank Grandpa Clint. I have so many ideas, just you wait. Clint's in for a rude ass awakening."

Clint visited maybe just as much as Tony or May. Maybe it was because he himself was a father and Peter had grown to be one of his favorite kids. In a way, Clint saw Peter as one of his own. He would do anything to protect him. So he dutifully took his seat next to Peter, running a hand through Peter's curls and murmuring words of comfort and assurance.

Bucky visited with Steve. Steve would come in looking sad, and Bucky was there to comfort him. On some days, Bucky would hold Steve as he cried. Steve felt personally responsible that he didn’t get to rescue Peter sooner. And even then, when he did rescue him, Steve didn’t offer words or encouragement or comfort to Peter, just let Tony hold him. Steve thought that he could have done more. Bucky related, thinking that Peter could have gotten to the compound sooner, if only he had flown the damn jet faster. Bucky and Steve held each other, consoling one another. But they stayed with Peter, offering their comfort as much as they could.

**

Peter was never alone. He always had someone by his side.

And that's all anyone could ask for, isn't it? A nice, supportive family.

Peter would get through this. With his family by his side, he would heal. He would mend. 

He will be okay.

And until then...

His family was always with him.

 


	14. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I didn't update yesterday, it was crazy hectic. Anyway, here's a new chapter!

For once, Peter didn't feel like complete shit. It was amazing really. There was no pain when he woke up. It was strange, he had gotten so used to associating pain with living. He awoke slowly, cracking his eyes open one by one. When he finally opened both his eyes, Mister Stark was sitting by his side, asleep. Peter felt a rush of happiness when he saw him. It was still strange, seeing him alive. Peter almost didn't believe it. He couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that he was safe, and that his family was alive.

 _His family was alive_.

Peter didn't know if this was really true. It might just be another dream. But God help him if it was, he was going to make this heaven last as long as he could.

With a small smile, Peter closed his eyes again.

It really was a wonderful dream he was living in.

**

Tony woke up with a small wince. He stood up and stretched, yawning as he did so. Then he looked back down on the small boy lying in front of him.

Peter was so small. So young. He sat back down, threading his fingers in Peter's disheveled curls. Although they had gotten Peter back, Tony still wasn't ready to accept the fact that he was okay and with him. He always liked maintaining contact with the boy. He couldn't risk losing him again. He needed that reassurance that Peter was still alive, still with him. Still intact, still human. Tony removed his hand from Peter's hair and brushed his hand against his kid's face, relishing in the warmth that it brought him. 

Peter let out a small sigh and turned his head deeper into Tony's palm.

Tony looked at the boy, shocked. And then he promised himself something.

_Peter Benjamin Parker will never again be hurt because of him._

**

"Bruce, are you sure? He's been asleep for so long, and I just...," Tony trailed off with a sigh. 

"He's fine Tony. His body needs to mend. He's been through a lot. Let him heal, let him mend."

"I know, I know. But I want my kid back."

"Well, you're in luck," came a small voice behind them. Tony spun around, eyes wide.

"Hi, Mister Stark," came the small, quiet voice of Peter Parker.

**

 His kid was awake. Tony rushed over to Peter's bedside, squeezing his hand.

"Pete! You're awake!"

Peter let out a small laugh, wincing when it hurt his throat.

"Yeah," he said dryly.

"I'm gonna go get everyone else, okay?"

_Everyone else._

"'kay," he mumbled, but inside he was screaming with joy. His family was here, and he was finally going to see them.

Tony ran out of the room, yelling, "May! Peter's awake, he's awake!"

May jumped up from her seat and ran towards Tony.

"He's awake? He's really, truly awake?"

"Yeah," Tony laughed.

"Our kid's awake!" May enveloped Tony in a tight hug, tears spilling down her cheeks.

"I'm going to go get the others, you go on ahead, okay?" Tony said warmly, touched by the way May had said 'our kid' versus 'my kid'.

May ran into the room happily, and Tony turned around to get everyone else.

**

"Oh, Peter!" May sobbed, tightly hugging the boy.

"Hi, May," Peter said softly, his own tears flowing down his cheeks.

"I missed you so much," he breathed into her blouse, staining it with his tears.

May sniffled and then hugged the boy even harder.

"You're home," she said happily, cupping her kid's face in her hands.

"Yeah. Yeah, I am," Peter whispered, too softly for May to here.

That's when Peter decided this wasn't a dream.

This was May, hugging the life out of him, this was May sobbing with relief, this was May right next to him.

This was euphoria. 

**

Tony had called all the Avengers and Ned and MJ to see Peter. They were just as thrilled as May.

Together, they had all ran into Peter's room beaming when they saw Peter.

"Peter!" they had all yelled, and then ran to embrace the boy.

"Hi, guys," Peter laughed quietly, more tears streaming down his face.

MJ laughed loudly, punching Peter softly in the arm, making sure there was no actual force behind it.

"About time you woke up!" she smiled.

"I was a bit occupied," he joked.

Peter turned towards Ned.

"Hi, Ned," he swallowed.

"Gosh dang it, Peter!" Ned yelled and then squeezed Peter into another hug. Peter smiled and returned his best friend's embrace. Still hugging Ned he turned his head to the side where he saw the rest of the Avengers, the rest of his family. He gave them a smile and mouthed, "Thank you."

**

They had all stayed up late that night. Everyone sat around Peter's bed, playing Uno, and then watching all of  _Star Wars_ together.

Peter wasn't totally healed yet. He still had the scars and the memories of what had happened to him. 

But looking around at the faces of his family, he smiled.

Because he would mend, and he would get better.

 _Fuck you, Damian Toomes,_ he thought. 

_All you did was bring me and my family closer._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)  
> Don't worry, for all you angst lovers. The remainder of this fic isn't all gonna be fluff. I don't even know if I'm capable of writing a whole fluff fic, tbh.


	15. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Nightmares(flashbacks)

_It hurt. It hurt a lot. God, why did it hurt so much?_

_Peter let out a scream as Toomes made another cut into his back, trying to insert whatever the fuck it was into his back._

_"Stay still, boy or you will get a far worse punishment later," Toomes snarled._

_Peter let out a muffled groan, trying his best to stay still._

_"'m sorry. 'm so sorry," he begged. "Please stop."_

_But Toomes didn't listen, of course he didn't. He made another cruel cut. Peter screamed, tears streaming down his cheeks._

_"Stay still, you little bastard, stay the hell still!" Toomes yelled, slapping his face._

_"'m sorry, 'm so so sorry, just stop. Please. Stop," Peter begged, sobbing._

_"If you stop moving and actually shut the hell up, it'll be done quicker. So shut the fuck up!"_

_Toomes made more cuts, opening up his back even more._

_Peter bit his lip tightly, letting out a small groan of pain. But he couldn't stop his yell when Toomes deepened the cut, practically stabbing him._

_"Stop, please-,"_

"Peter!" 

Tony shook the crying boy's shoulder, trying to wake him up.

"Peter, it's just a dream, you're safe. You're safe," Tony assured.

Peter let out another sob and tried squirming away.

"No, let me go, please, I can't- I, I can't,"

"Peter!"

"Just let me go, I'll do anythin-,"

"PETER!"

 Peter finally woke up, sobbing.

"Pete, hey it's okay, you're safe," Tony whispered, running his hand through Peter's sweaty hair.

"You're okay, it's okay." Peter finally looked up at Tony, eyes red, tears still streaming down his face.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I-I j-just... I  _can't_ ," Peter hiccuped, burying his face in his hands.

"Don't ever apologize about having a nightmare.  _Ever_ , do you understand? We're all here for you, okay?" Tony said sternly, but with comfort radiating throughout his tone.

Peter sniffled, and then he broke down again.

"Hey, it's okay. It's okay," Tony said, and he laid down next to his kid, wiping away the tears on his face with his hand.

"I got you," he murmured, pulling Peter close to his chest. "No one's ever going to hurt you again."

Peter buried his face into Tony's neck, fisting Tony's shirt in his small hand.

Tony rubbed comforting circles into Peter's back, whispering words of comfort, clenching the sobbing boy tighter into his chest. When his sobs finally died down, Peter looked at Tony.

"T'nk you, M'str St'rk," he mumbled, eyes closing.

Tony wiped the remaining tears away from Peter's face, offering the boy a small smile.

"I'm always here for you, Pete. You're safe now," he promised.

Maybe Peter heard it, and maybe he didn't. He fell asleep again quickly, head lolling against Tony's chest. But it didn't matter, because Tony kept repeating the words.

And this time, Peter only dreamt of this moment, with Mister Stark holding him while he slept.

**

After what happened, Tony didn't leave Peter. Even when the kid fell asleep, curled into Tony's side, he didn't leave. He embraced his kid tighter, and kept running his fingers through Peter's hair. He couldn't stop thinking about Peter's begs, his pleas. He had cried so hard. Lying next to his child in the dark, guilt hit Tony like a train. His kid had gotten tortured, had gotten hurt so much to the point where he was sobbing and screaming and pleading and begging and-

Tony closed his eyes tightly, gripping Peter even tighter.

 _My fault,_ Tony thought.

It was his fault. His fault that his kid couldn't sleep peacefully like a normal kid.

All because Tony couldn't protect him. Because Tony was selfish, and ignorant, and stupid because he couldn't save his kid faster.

He left Peter in that hellhole for a month.

A whole fucking month.

Tony Stark, genius billionaire, couldn't rescue a fifteen year old kid.

And not just any fifteen year old kid.

His fifteen year old kid.

He left his fifteen year old kid with a psychotic bitch alone for a month. He left his kid, strapped down to a metal table, bleeding and bruised for a _whole fucking month._ Tony felt his own tears escape his eyes at the thought of what happened to Peter alone for a month. He had the videos, yes, but he didn't see everything that had happened to him. So much could have happened to Peter in the time that the camera wasn't rolling. So fucking much.

Tony had delivered Peter into the infirmary covered in bruises and blood and scars.

Now, a week later, Peter was still covered in bruises and scars. Even with his enhanced healing, Peter had suffered so much that he was still covered in bruises. He still had his scars. Both on the outside and inside, Peter's scars ran deep.

Tony ran his hand over Peter's back, sobbing silently.

 _This is my kid_ , he thought,  _This is my kid lying here, broken._

_And it's all my fault._

_It's all my fault._

Tony pulled Peter's head close to his chest.

 _Never again,_ he vowed.

Never again would another fucking bastard touch Tony Stark's son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I really have the audacity to hurt Peter even more?  
> I think the fuck so;)


	16. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't updated in a hot minute. But here's a new chapter:)

Damian Toomes really was an evil man. Not only did he kidnap a minor, he also experimented and tortured said minor. He kept the minor malnourished, and caused the child extreme trauma. He kept the child his captive for a month, and when he left him, he left him dying and bleeding.

Tony Stark really hated Damian Toomes. He has never thought that he had the capability to despise a human being so much, but the day has arrived. No, scratch that. The day Toomes took his child, he started his reign of hatred. It was like a fire burning inside him, raging screaming. The fire would only be extinguished with Toomes's death, and even then the fire inside him would still rage. It would still live for his hurting child.

The only thing that provided Tony Stark the least bit of comfort was imagining various forms of death for Toomes. All by his own hand, of course. For hours, Tony Stark would sit next to his sleeping child, holding his hand and imagining how he would destroy Damian Toomes. How he would crush the man, how he would make him scream and plead for mercy. But Tony Stark would have no mercy to offer. He would destroy Damian Toomes like how the bastard had destroyed his kid.

Tony Stark is an Avenger.

And rest assured, he would avenge his son.

**

Tony brushed a lock of hair away from Peter's forehead, his finger lightly brushing Peter's face, outlining his facial features. He smiled a little when Peter turned his head into Tony's touch, letting out a small content sigh as the boy slept.

"FRIDAY, alert me if anything happens," Tony said, giving Peter's hand a squeeze before leaving. May was waiting outside, and gave Tony a small, sad smile. She walked up to him, and embraced the man, whispering, "Thank you," and then walking in to sit next to her nephew. Tony stared May in shock. Why on earth was she thanking him? He was the reason why Peter was hurt right now. The reason why her kid was having nightmares, why her kid couldn't catch a damn break. 

Tony should have done more. He was  _Tony Stark_ for God's sake. 

Genius,

Billionaire,

Playboy, 

Philanthropist.

Tony scoffed at the thought. He was no philanthropist. He sure as hell didn't look out for the welfare of his own kid, much less anyone else's. 

But that's what the public deemed him as, and Tony embraced it.

He didn't look out for his son before, but he would now. He would protect his child at all costs.

**

Tony walked into the conference room, where the rest of the Avengers were.

"What do we have? Any leads? Any fucking clue as to where the bastard is?"

Nat spoke up first.

"Tony. I would do anything for Peter, and God help me, I want to destroy that bastard for what he did to him, I really fucking do. But-,"

"But what, Nat?" Tony snapped. "If there is any clue, no matter how small it is, I will chase it and I will find Toomes and I will rip him apart with my bare fucking hands."

"Tony. We can't be rash about this. We can't follow every blind lead we have. Some are so small that they might as well be nonexistent," Nat argued.

"I don't give a shit! My kid is lying in my fucking infirmary right now because I couldn't find him sooner. Because I couldn't trace all the clues, because I couldn't figure out or see all the fucking leads. My child is lying in my fucking home, injured and scared and fucking broken. I watched him die, Nat. I watched my child die and then suffer through more pain when we brought him back. That's twice now. Both because of me, because I couldn't protect my fucking child!" Tony screamed at her.

"Tony-," Nat started, but Tony cut her off. "Unless you're about to tell me a lead, don't say anything. Don't you think I know, Nat? Of course I know that every lead might be a dead end, that none of them will help. But I can't sit here, with my son lying injured and not do a damn thing about it. I can't just sit here, and pretend everything is okay. If there's even a chance that I can get my hands on the bitch, I will. Because I can't fucking sit here, knowing that Toomes is still out there roaming free like he never laid a hand on Peter. If there is a chance, even the smallest fucking chance that I can find him, I will. I have to."

Nat's gaze softened.

"What's really going on, Tony?" she asked softly.

Tony let out a heavy sigh and sat down, holding his head in his hands. Steve walked over, slinging an arm over Tony's shoulders.

"What's wrong?" he asked, blue eyes piercing.

"I just... I don't know. I don't know what to fucking do. And I feel like it's my fault, and it is my fault. I couldn't rescue my kid sooner, and look what that did to him. How could I have fucking left my kid alone with that bastard for a month? A fucking month, Peter was tortured. Because I couldn't get to him, and it's my fault that the kid can't catch a goddamn break. And what happens afterward? We catch Toomes, yes, but Peter? He'll be haunted by this. And he'll hate me, because I couldn't fucking get to him sooner. Look at all this tech. All the money I have. All my suits. And it took me a damn month to get to my son, and that was only because Toomes gave us the location. I can't stand it if Peter hates me, so if I kill Toomes, if I show Peter that I care for him more then I do for myself, then I have to do it. I can't lose my son again. I can't," he whispered trailing off with a small sob.

The Avengers stared at him with shock. They knew Tony was grieving, yes, but how did it get this fucking bad? Without another word, they all huddled around Tony. Every single one of them sat or crouched or fucking kneeled next to Tony, and they all embraced him. They took the sobbing man in their arms, wrapping him up in their comfort. 

They cried together that day.

Every single one of the Avengers felt tears trickling down their cheeks, and they all embraced and mourned together.

They all cried for their favorite teenager, for their child. 

They all made a promise that day as well.

They would find Damian Toomes. 

No matter what it would take.

**

"Okay. This is what we have so far. It's not much, but I think if we trace this down, maybe talk to some neighbors or witnesses we can eventually find Toomes."

"Let's do it," Tony immediately replied, eyes still red.

"Facial recognition picked up this man just on the outskirts of New Jersey. His name is Jeremy Spangled. After some digging, I've found out that he is actually Toomes's second cousin. He was the one who took Peter and put him into the vehicle. Speaking of which, the vehicle was found near Spangled's residence, badly damaged. Toomes was nowhere to be seen."

"Jeremy Spangled..." Tony muttered. "Let's go pay him a visit, shall we?"

The Avengers suited up, and made their way to New Jersey, Tony especially desperate for any information on Toomes's whereabouts.

Needless to say, they arrived in record time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? Suggestions? Leave a comment, tell me what you think. They make my day:)  
> On an unrelated note, I'm currently working on a one-shot that's pretty damn fluffy to balance out all the angst in this. It's nothing related to this story, but it'll be up sometime today if anyone wants to check it out. Keep your eyes open:)


	17. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony and May are not going to be in a romantic relationship together. They will grow together with Peter but they will never be romantically involved. They are connected through co-parenting and Peter, which will develop more as the story continues.  
> Warnings: Psychological torture(videos), beatings

"Listen here, motherfucker. I have with me a lot of weapons that could cause an ass load of pain. Care to be cooperative?" Clint snarled holding the man in a chokehold.

The Avengers had found Jeremy Spangled without a hitch. It wasn't that difficult, all they had to do was talk to some old ladies after rescuing a few cats. Jeremy Spangled lived in New Jersey, apartment complex fifty eight, room three hundred one.

They knocked politely, then proceeded to slam him against the wall. Thankfully, the walls weren't thin and no one else lived with him.

Jeremy was very tight-lipped. He wouldn't say a fucking thing to any of the Avengers.

"Rot in hell. I'm not saying shit," he growled, earning him a split lip by Tony.

So, the Avengers kidnapped him. In a way, Tony was pleased. Toomes took a beloved family member of his, it seemed only fitting that Tony take one of his.

The little bastard was in the back of their truck, unconscious and tied up.

Oh, it would be fun to break this one. Even better, they get another reward. The location of Toomes.

Tony wasn't sorry at all. He didn't regret his thoughts. If the little fucker didn't tell the location of one Damian Toomes, Tony would break him until he does. And he would enjoy every damn minute of it, because the little shit had laid his hands on his son. Because the motherfucker helped rip away Tony's son from him to be tortured and experimented on. Because his son was laying in bed, in pain, probably with PTSD because this bitch layed their dirty, dirty hands on  _his kid._

So, yeah. Tony wasn't sorry. He would never be sorry. He would enjoy every minute of this man's pain. 

He would enforce and enjoy how much pain Jeremy Spangled will go through for his son. 

Every damn thing his son felt, Jeremy Spangled would feel, but magnified by a hundred.

And Tony Stark would sit and watch, a cold glare on his face.

**

As it turns out, Jeremy Spangled was more of a bastard than Tony had originally thought.

The Avengers had flown him to the compound, locked him in a cell, and tied him to a chair. 

Even better, they had let alone with one very angry former Russian spy.

Natasha Romanoff. 

They had a lovely thirty minute session before Tony decided to interrupt. He let out a small smile when he saw all the bruises on the man's face. When he saw the burns, when he saw the blood. To some, Tony would seem sadistic. Maybe that applied, but Tony brushed the thought away. He was doing this for kid, his son, and there was no fucking thing that Tony wouldn't do for his son. Tony inhaled deeply, then crouched down next to the man.

"Hi, there. I'm Tony Stark. And you, Jeremy Spangled, are in a whole shit ton of trouble," he announced with a smile.

"As I told the scary lady, fuck off. I'm not saying shit."

Tony's smile slid off his face, and was instantly replaced by the coldest glare Mr. Spangled had ever seen. Jeremy squirmed a bit, but his face remained calm. 

"Listen here, fucker. My kid is upstairs, unconscious, because you laid your shit hands on him and put him in your damn truck. He wouldn't be nearly dead if it weren't for you and your cousin. You wouldn't be here either. But who knows, maybe it's a good thing you're here. I get to take out my anger out on you, preparing me for what Toomes is going to go through. Now, you can either tell me where the hell Toomes is, or I can do something far worse than what Nat already did," Tony growled. Then he gave Nat a small smile, sending her his gratitude. The woman nodded grimly in response.

Jeremy Spangled smiled a cold smile.

"Rot. In. Hell."

Tony gave the man a smile as well. 

Then promptly punched him in the face.

"You hurt my child. You fucking touched my child and let him be tortured. You, you little motherfucker,  _touched my fucking child_. You let an innocent, fifteen year old boy be experimented on. WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE LETTING MY CHILD BE HURT LIKE THAT?" Tony roared, punching the man even harder, raining down punches like their was no tomorrow.

"You, you little fucker. He's  _mine. My child._ And you thought you could just rip him away from me?" he breathed in between hits.

"You had NO FUCKING RIGHT TO TOUCH MY SON!" He yelled angrily, kicking Spangled in the stomach, in the side, in the crotch. Tony breathed heavily, then grabbed Spangled's throat and whispered in his ear, "You're never leaving. Hell is coming for you, Jeremy Spangled. I will make you regret you ever laid a hand on my kid." 

"You know, Stark, if you go back to my place you should find some videos. In those videos, there are some very explicit content I'm sure you would love to see. Everything that you saw, what my cousin sent you, that wasn't even a fourth of what he did to him. Of what I did to him. That little shit was quiet. Refused to say anything for a while, refused to yell, to scream. And then one day, he broke. He fucking broke, Stark. And I have video footage of it all. You want to know everything that happened to your son, why I won't tell you where my cousin is? Watch the damn videos. I hope they break you like they broke your son," Spangled spat, spitting out blood.

Tony saw red. All his moral intentions were gone and all he saw was the little bastard in front of him, who hurt his child. 

Tony let out a side of him no one has ever seen before. He punched the shit out of the little shit, kicked him, spit on him. When he was done beating the living hell out of him, he grabbed Spangled's throat. He squeezed so hard his hands turned red. Spangled let out a series of chocked gurgling noises but that didn't stop Tony. Right when Spangled was at the edge of death, Nat's laid a hand on his shoulder.

"We need him alive, Tony," she whispered softly.

Tony gave one last squeeze and then let go. Spangled instantly inhaled, gasping sharply.

"Keep him in pain. Always. But don't kill him. I want to do that myself, when I have Toomes, so that I can kill the fuckers together. Bring him right up on the edge of death, and keep him that way constantly. I want him in pain, Romanoff. Never a moment of rest, you hear me? I don't give a damn if he says shit. Keep the bastard in pain," Tony snarled, giving the man one last kick.

Nat glared coldly at the bleeding mess in front of her.

"With pleasure."

**

Shit. Oh shit.

Holy

Mother

Fucking

Shit.

After Tony's stomach was finally emptied, the impact of what he just saw finally hit him.

He had gone back for the videos.

And he regrets it so fucking much, because how can someone do that to a kid? And not just any kid, but Peter Parker? Peter Parker who was only fifteen, Peter who was so young, Peter  who still fucking played with Legos and watched Star Wars because that's how precious and innocent Peter Parker really is.

How could anyone do something that evil to Peter Parker? Peter Parker, who's just a kid, Peter Parker who was Tony's son. He was Tony's kid, and he left his son with those bastards as they hurt him, cut him open, fucked with his mind, injected him with God knows what?

How could anyone cut into his fucking back, wrap something around his fucking spine, punch the living shit out of him, kick the living shit out of him, how could the bastards fucking convince Peter that his family abandoned him, and that his family was fucking dead?

How could anyone hurt Peter fucking Parker?

How could anyone hurt Tony Stark's son?

**

_"You know it, Parker. You know that you'll never see your family again. You fucking know it Parker, so why are you denying it?"_

_Peter just rolled his jaw, glaring at the older man._

_"You know it, Peter. The quicker you realize that, the less it will hurt."_

_Peter didn't say anything, looking at the ground._

_"Hey. Look at me when I talk to you, you little shit."_

_Peter's head snapped up, but he still didn't say anything._

_"Peter Benjamin Parker. That's a nice name. But guess what, Peter? No one you love will ever say your name again. You know why? Because they left you, because they don't want you . anymore . It is what it is, Pete. And in this situation, your family is tired of you. They don't want you anymore. You're just a burden, just a little shit they have to look after. With you here, with me, you're doing them a favor. Your Aunt May? She actually messaged me, you know. Sent me a little letter, telling me how grateful she was." Toomes held up the letter, smirking because he had wrote it. But using his tech, he changed it so that it looked like May's handwriting._

_And finally, Peter showed that he agreed with Toomes._

_With a single tear rolling down his cheek, he whispered, "I know."_

_**_

_"Your family left you! They left you here, with me, because you're just an useless piece of shit! You're a burden, Parker and that's why they got rid of you!" Toomes yelled, while beating Peter's face. His nose, broken, was dripping blood, he had a split lip, and bruises everywhere._

_"Why do you think Tony hasn't come for you yet? It's because he doesn't want you. May doesn't want you. The Avengers don't want you. No one wants you," Toomes whispered into Peter's ear, hands gripping Peter's hair tightly. "No one's coming for you. And it's because you, you little shit, are unwanted._

_**_

_Peter let out a scream._

_"I want to hear you say it. Say it!"_

_Peter just let out a sob and shook his head._

_Toomes shook his head angrily and made another deep cut into Peter's arm._

_"Say it!"_

_Peter just let out another sob._

_Toomes glared at the boy._

_"Fine."_

_Then the scalpel he was cutting into Peter with disappeared into the young boy's thigh._

_Peter screamed and thrashed in his restraints._

_"Say it!"_

_But Peter just kept shaking his head, sobbing._

_Toomes sighed, then gripped the scalpel and slowly turned it._

_"S-stop!" Peter finally groaned out._

_"Then say it!"_

_And Peter did._

_"My f-family d-doesn't want m-me any-anymore. I'm I'm j-j-just a burden," he whispered, tears streaming down his bloodied face._

_Toomes looked at him spitefully._

_"That's right, you little shit. Don't forget it."_

_**_

There were more. Tony watched all of them. Cried through all of them, threw up at the very end.

How could he have let this happen to his child? How could he have left him?

And now, curled up next to his toilet barfing his stomach out, Tony has never cried harder. His whole body racks with sobs, and he's shaking uncontrollably. He cries and sobs and punches the wall.

Tony stayed in the bathroom for a long time. When he was done sobbing he sat down. He buried his face in his arms and sat there. 

When he finally stood up again, all he felt was anger.

One last tear trickling out of his eye, he walked to the infirmary where Peter lay. May was there with him, her own tears shining in her eyes. Tony took a seat next to her, putting one hand in hers comfortingly and the other in Peter's.

The two looked at their small, sleeping child together, taking comfort in each other's presences. 

Tony stayed with May and Peter the rest of the day.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :')  
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated!:)  
> Also, I have a one-shot that's up if you want to check it out. I would really love your guys' thoughts and opinions on it:)  
> On another note, if any of you guys are Percy Jackson fans- and if you aren't, watchu doing with your lives?- I highly recommend Percy_Jackson_Is_Life; her works are amazing. Heads up though: they kind of depressing;)


	18. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Nightmares

Tony decided to pay another visit to the one and only Jeremy Spangled. To his pleasure, the man was bleeding everywhere, bruises dotting every inch of his skin. But it also hurt. Because Peter had looked just like the bastard, still looks like the evil bastard. Tony closes his eyes briefly before taking a seat next to Spangled. He uses one finger to lift Spangled's chin from his neck, taking pleasure when the asswipe gasped in pain.

"I'm back. Are we feeling a bit more cooperative?" 

Breathing through the pain, Spangled replies," You know, he's not actually your son. Answer me this, Stark. Why do you care for the boy so much? He's just a stupid kid." 

Tony glares at his prisoner, then punches him in the face, eyes blazing with fury. Spangled spits out blood, then cruelly replies, "It's guilt, isn't it? You can't handle the fact that you couldn't save the kid in time. And he wasn't even your kid. You feel guilt because you couldn't save an innocent kid. He's not yours, Stark. He never will be yours. Feeling guilty won't change the fact that you couldn't save the kid. Beating me won't make you feel better. It won't make the kid yours. He isn't yours. And he never will be."

Tony inhales sharply. It's not because he's shocked. It's because deep down, he knew it. Peter wasn't his. Peter won't be his. Either way, he wouldn't want to be Tony's kid, not after Tony failed to rescue him. 

So, Tony stands up. He stands up, kicks Spangled in the crotch and says softly, "I know he isn't mine, not technically. But I feel for him like he's my own child, and that's what he is to me. He's my son, and insisting otherwise won't make a difference.  _He's my kid_."

Without further ado, he leaves the cell, making sure he slams the door loudly.

**

The sound of Peter's pained whimpers cut into Tony's heart like a knife. 

"Peter. Peter, it's just a dream. You're okay, we got you out. You're okay, you're not there anymore," Tony comforted, hand gently caressing Peter's face.

Peter just let out another muted groan and mumbled, "Stop, stop, stop. Please, stop."

"Peter, you're okay. I got you. You're safe," Tony whispered gently, moving his hand to Peter's hair, tangling his fingers in Peter's curls. He continued threading his fingers in and out of Peter's hair, murmuring comforting words. When Peter's breathing finally calmed down, Tony let out a sigh of relief. 

Tony moved his hand out of Peter's scalp to the young boy's back, rubbing comforting circles. Peter hummed in contentment, and Tony let out a small smile. He removed his hand, but something quickly grabbed it. Peter's weak hand had grabbed his wrist.

"Don' go."

The words were sleepy, tired. But Tony just twisted his fingers into his son's and murmured, "Never. I'm never leaving you."

**

Peter has more nightmares after that. Of course he does, he's only fifteen and he's been tortured and experimented on and...

Peter's sharp gasp of breath snapped Tony out of his daze and he immediately moved his hand into Peter's hair, comforting the distressed boy. Peter let out a pained whimper and squirmed in the bed, gasping, "I can't do this, I can't, I-I-I can't."

Tony can't think. He can't think because his kid was lying, having a nightmare, and he was pleading for the pain to stop and Tony can't do anything. So, Tony does what he's been doing ever since Peter has been rescued. He comforted his son.

Tony crawled into Peter's bed, and held him close to his chest, his free hand moving to Peter's hair once again.

"I got you. I'm here, Peter, I'm here," he whispered into the boy's ear.

Peter let out another distressed groan.

"It's okay. I got you, you're gonna be okay."

Peter trembled next to Tony, breaths coming out shakily.

"I-I d-don't wan-want to do this any-anymore,"Peter whispered, shaking even harder.

"I-I  _can't-,"_   Peter cut himself off with a gasp.

"You're okay, I got you, you're safe," Tony said softly, running his fingers through Peter's matted curls.

Finally, the boy calmed down, his breathing slowing, body no longer trembling. 

"I got you," Tony whispered. "And I'm never letting go."

Peter turned his body into Tony, pressing his face against Tony's chest, hand weakly fisting Tony's shirt.

Tony paused for a moment before tenderly tucking Peter's head underneath his chin, hand rubbing Peter's back comfortingly.

Peter fell back asleep, wrapped tightly in his father's arms.

Tony pressed his face into Peter's hair and held Peter even tighter.

Tony fell asleep embracing his son.

**

Peter never stays awake long. He would blink slowly, and then fall right back into unconsciousness where his personal demons from hell awaited him.

Tony has never wanted to see Peter's eyes focus on him more.

He misses Peter, mourns for him in the way only a father could.

Tony Stark is not a religious man. But now, sitting next to his hurt child, he prayed for a healthy recovery.

**

"T'ny?"

The voice is quiet. Small. Unsure. But it's still a voice that Tony had so longed to hear.

And all of a sudden, Tony is awake because that's a voice he can't forget. He snaps up from the seat he was slumped in and immediately focused on the one person who's open eyes have  _never been more fucking beautiful._

Pain filled, red rimmed, fucking  _gorgeous_ brown eyes meet Tony's distressed ones.

"Hi, Pete," Tony whispers, grabbing the younger boy's hand. Peter blinks sluggishly before focusing on Tony.

"Hi," he mumbles. Tony lets out a small, watery laugh and squeezes Peter's hand.

"May?" Peter asks softly, eyes looking everywhere but at Tony. Tony's heart clenches painfully, but he answers, "She's asleep in one of the guest rooms down the hall," with a sad smile.

"Oh."

Tony's heart clenches painfully once again because his kid is so small, so young. He's so fucking young. Tony lets out a deep breath and runs his hand over Peter's face, tracing his features, memorizing them. Peter lets out a small sigh and leans into the touch, eyes drooping shut.

"T'ny," Peter mumbles, half asleep.

"Yeah, kiddo?"

"Th'nk you. Th'nk you so much," the boy whispers.

Tony smiles sadly at his kid, his son.

"No problem," he whispers, moving his hand from Peter's face to lightly caress the tired boy's hair.

"Love you."

The voice is quiet and sleepy, but the words were said, and the words were heard. Tony looked at Peter with nothing but parental love. This kid was his, and he had just said "love you," to Tony. Never before had two quiet words meant so much to Tony before, hell to anyone.

Tony brought his hand back down to Peter's cheek, lightly tracing a finger around it.

"I love you too. More than you know," Tony murmurs.

Peter's eyes close once more, and he returns back into the land of sleep.

But not before he lifted his own frail hand to Tony's chest, whispering, "Thank you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ideas, suggestions, thoughts, criticisms? Feel free to leave a comment.  
> Also, I promise that there will be more plot related things soon, but I feel like all these moments that Tony shares with Peter are a vital part of Peter's healing process.


	19. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 10k hits? wHaT?  
> You guys are seriously so fucking amazing.  
> Warning: Lack of self worth(I don’t really know how to describe it, sorry :/)

Another week passed before Helen Cho decided that Peter could finally leave the infirmary.

It was a painful week filled with tears and sweat.

But within that week, there was also comfort.

Peter relished in it, trying to enjoy the concern and love while it lasted. As soon as he was completely healed, Tony wouldn't care as much. He would leave him. May, too. He was just another burden on her plate as well. A part of Peter was thoroughly disgusted with himself. He was inconveniencing everyone around him. He made those he cared about waste time with his stupid needs that he should be able to handle by himself. But the selfish part of him never wanted to let go. He wanted Mister Stark to stay with him, to run his gentle fingers through Peter's hair, softly whispering words of encouragement. He wanted May, who never left him alone for more than a few short moments, who held his hand tightly and told him stories. He wanted the Avengers who told him stories of their Avengers, wanted Happy who stayed with him, head bowed, but still with him, wanted his friends who spent every free moment they had with him

He just wanted to stay with his family.

But he knows he can't. Knows that everyone will leave once he's fixed.

So he enjoys the feeling of Mister Stark's around him when he has a bad dream.

He enjoys May's comforting presence.

He enjoys his teammates' attention.

He enjoys MJ's sarcastic quips and Ned's constant string of, "MJ!"

He holds onto it, memorizing every moment he got with his family because he knows they will be ripped away soon enough.

**

Ned and MJ spent their last day of the break before school with Peter. 

With Peter finally out of the Med-Bay, they got to hang out more. They played chess, which Peter sucked ass at but MJ was weirdly amazing at, and he and Ned played  _Dungeons and Dragons_ together while MJ made snarky comments about the pair's nerdiness.

They rewatched  _Aliens_ together, as well as all the  _Star Wars_ movies so that MJ finally could finally understand all their geeky references.

And on the last day, they watched all their favorite movies together, Peter squeezed in between Mj and Ned.

Towards the end of _The Empire Strikes Back_ , Peter rested his head on MJ's shoulder and took her hand. MJ gave his hand a squeeze and then returned her focus to the screen, still holding Peter's hand. Ned stares at the two and smiles. Maybe this is how Peter would heal. With his girlfriend and best friend crammed next to him, watching old movies.

Peter turns his head toward Ned slightly and mouths, "Dude," with a small smile. Ned smiles back in return and mouths, "I know," right back at him.

When it's time for the two to leave Ned embraces Peter tightly and gives a watery smile.

"I'll swing by every day after school. Maybe bring a new LEGO set," he says, unshed tears gleaming in his eyes. Peter hugs his best friend tighter, and gives him a small smile. It's unsaid, but the message was received.

_Thank you. I love you so much._

Ned sniffles, gives Peter one last squeeze and walks out, leaving Peter and MJ alone.

MJ also gives Peter hug, but right before she lets go of him, she gives him a kiss.

"Love you, dork."

And then she leaves.

It's so MJ, but Peter couldn't have imagined his first kiss with her any differently.

**

He replays his last moments with his friends over and over again. Once again, his conscious was having a raging battle.

_How could you, you selfish brat? Now you're inconveniencing one of the only friends you have?_

_They're mine. She's mine. I'm not letting go of them._

_No. But they might let go of you._

The other side of him doesn't say anything, but Peter could feel it. The pounding, stabbing feeling of, "Yeah. I know."

**

Peter sat down on the floor, curling into a ball against the wall.

He did this a lot when the thoughts became too much.

He just wanted peace.

He wanted his soul to rest.

He wanted the quiet that had existed before everything went to hell. Peter clenched his eyes shut as the memories flooded in his mind.

_You stupid, stupid idiot._

_You little shit._

_Fucking brat._

The knives were cutting into his skin again, drawing blood, leaving him bleeding and crying.

The shocks return, leaving Peter trembling afterwards.

The verbal beat downs come crashing down, drowning him.

_No one's coming, little shit._

_Your family is dead Peter. They died because of you._

_This is your fucking fault._

_Stop crying, you worthless idiot._

_You don't deserve anything._

Peter curls rocks back and forth, gasping, tears streaming down his cheeks.

_FUCKING IDIOT_

_WORTHLESS_

_PIECE OF SHIT_

_UNWANTED_

_JUST A BURDEN_

Peter's chest is heaving and he's dimly aware that he's shaking, that he's sobbing, but all he does is grip his head, squeezes his eyes shut even harder.

_INCONVIENCE_

_SCUM_

_NOTHING MORE THAN AN EXPERIMENT_

_FAILURE_

Peter thinks he must be being crushed. His chest is heavy and he can't breathe.

Everything is so bright.

The world's to loud.

It's to fucking loud, and Peter clenches his head in agony, because the memories fucking hurt.

He just wanted quiet.

Eventually his sobs die down, but he's still shaking, still gasping, tears still falling down his cheeks.

Then, like a fucking goddamn miracle, Mister Stark's with him, holding him tightly, whispering, "You're alright," over and over again and Peter can't bring himself to yell, "I'm not. I'm really fucking not."

But Mister Stark must be able to read his fucking mind because he runs his fingers through Peter's curls and repeats, "You're okay." The older man rubs the nape of Peter's neck, and Peter pulls himself into Mister Stark's chest despite his mind screaming at him, "You fucking idiot. You stupid, stupid fucking  _idiot._ "

But Mister Stark holds him tighter, and Peter's head is right where Mister Stark's heart is, and he listens to the beat of his mentor's heart, breathing when Mister Stark does.

It's not completely silent.

But it's better.

Peter holds onto "better".

**

"Boss, Peter is having a panic attack in his bedroom," FRIDAY alerts him, but Tony was already up when the AI had uttered the words, "Peter." He runs into Peter's room as fast his legs would carry him.

As soon as Tony sees the disheveled boy in front of him, his heart breaks.

It shatters into a million pieces.

Tony kneels down next to Peter and scoops up the shaking boy without another word, rocking him back and forth, murmuring, "You're okay," repeatedly. 

Peter lets out another sob and shakes his head, and Tony clutches his kid tighter and repeats his words.

Eventually, Peter's head lolls against Tony's chest, and Tony ran his hand from the back of his son's head all the way down to his spine and repeats the motion until Peter is silent and no longer shaking.

But Tony doesn't move.

He stays on the hard floor, clutching his kid like a lifeline and doesn't let go.

When Peter falls asleep in his arms, he still doesn't let go.

He carries his sleeping son into his bed, and lies down next to the young boy, tucking him safely into Tony's chest, slinging a protective arm over Peter's ribcage.

He falls asleep with his son curled around him, inhaling and exhaling at the same time his child does.

**

May walks into Peter's bedroom and smiles sadly at the sight of Peter curled around Tony. She walks further into the room, stopping when she reached the bed. She runs her fingers gently down Peter's spine, taking comfort with the feel of him, takes comfort knowing that her child is safe, and is here. 

She removes her hand from Peter's back and slowly eased herself into Peter's bed, wrapping her arms protectively around him, making sure that she doesn't wake Tony or Peter up.

It doesn't take long for her to fall asleep either.

**

And so, Peter Parker goes to sleep peacefully, wrapped in the arms of his parents.

It's peaceful.

Quiet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm planning a sequel...  
> This story isn't done yet, but when it is, there will be a sequel. This doesn't mean that this story will be done anytime soon, we still have Peter's whole recovery process:)  
> *Thank you so much for reading, leave a comment or kudos?*


	20. Chapter 19

Peter shifts in his sleep, letting out a small moan. May and Tony simultaneously wraps their arms tighter around their child, both parents still deeply asleep. Peter lets out another moan, but this one is louder, more desperate.

Tony snaps awake the same time May does. One glance, that's all it takes before Peter Parker's parents snap into action. 

Tony scoops Peter into his arms, and May sits in front of them, her hand running through Peter's hair.

Peter lets out a small groan, which is quickly muffled by his father's shirt.

"Shhh, you're okay," Tony whispered, thumb rubbing against Peter's temple comfortingly. May shoots Tony a small smile before directing her attention back to Peter. She runs her fingers all over his back, lightly spelling out, "We love you," all over his back. 

It takes a while before Peter's nightmare passes. At some point during the night, his small fingers curl into Tony's shirt tightly and they remain there. Tony uses one hand to clutch Peter's head tightly into his chest and his other hand rests on top of Peter's own on his chest. Tony run his fingers over Peter's wrist, listening to the pounding pulse.

May wraps her arms around her child, resting them on top of Tony's. She lays her head gently onto Peter's shoulder.

They stay like that until the sun comes up, streaking the dark sky with brilliant rays of light and color.

And Tony couldn't help symbolize the moment.

Just like the sky turned bright and brilliant after so much time in the dark, so would his son.

Peter Parker would shine as bright as the fucking sun.

**

Tony holds his sleeping child in his arms, hand resting on top of the nape of his son's neck, securing him to his chest. 

Once again, Peter shifts but this time it's peaceful. He snuggles in deeper into his father's chest, fingers curling tighter into Tony's shirt. Tony presses his face into Peter's hair, kissing the crown of his son's head softly.

If Tony had asked himself whether he saw himself as a father a year ago, he would have responded with a, "Hell no."

Now, he can't imagine himself in a situation without Peter. 

He couldn't imagine himself without his son.

The Tony Stark from a year ago didn't know what he was missing out on.

**

May Parker thought that her world had shattered when Ben had died.

Then Peter did everything he could to make her happy. 

Peter became May's lifeline, became the one thing May could count on to never leave her.

Now, she knows what it's like to have someone's world shattered, to have it completely destroyed.

She knew what it felt like.

It felt like the sleeping child in her arms, felt like the hurt and the worry radiating throughout her child's frail body.

But, May had an engineer, a mechanic, a fucking genius with her now.

She would piece her world back together.

**

Peter wakes up enveloped in Tony and May's arms.

For once, he feels safe. He feels comfort, he feels... not happy, but the feeling of despair has left his chest, at least for now.

Peter lets out a small, content sigh and snuggles his face deeper into Mister Stark's chest.

"Hi, kiddo," he whispers, running his fingers through Peter hair. Peter leans into the touch, because it feels so damn nice, and it feels safe, and it feels like home.

Peter lifts his head slowly to look at the older man.

"Hi, dad," he whispers, lifting his hand to touch Tony's face. He lightly traces out Mister Stark's features, then nestles his face into his father's shoulder.

He feels his dad's chest vibrate with laughter, and hears the faint, "Hi, Peter. My son."

And so, Peter Parker finds himself with a father.

Maybe something good came out of all his misery.

He has a father now.

Peter's screaming with joy internally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the next few chapters, there will be a lot of development in coparenting. While May and Tony figure all of it out, the story will mostly be in Tony's POV. When all of that is sorted through, it will be Peter's POV.  
> The sequel will be mostly Peter's POV, with brief Tony POV moments.  
> *Leave a comment or kudos? They make my day:)*


	21. Chapter  20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: suicidal thoughts, antidepressants

Tony and May soon came up with an agreement. While there were no possible way for Tony to become Peter's dad legally without May either marrying him or dying, Tony was Peter's dad. Tony and May's relationship, while platonic, grew stronger as Peter did. Tony was there for Peter when May couldn't be, he was there for Peter when May could be, he was always with Peter.

Every nightmare was taken care of with Tony by Peter's side.

Every tear was wiped away by Tony.

Every comforting hug had Tony's arms wrapped around Peter.

May had to admit, Tony was Peter's father. Maybe not by blood, not by law, but there was no denying it. Tony Stark was Peter Parker's father. May and Tony were always there for Peter. 

Peter was... not okay. He wasn't okay at all. But he was healing. And for now, that's all that mattered. 

**

"Hello, Peter. How are you today?"

"I'm fine," the teenager mumbled, looking down at his shoes.

"I know. It's very daunting all of this. But, I'm here to help you through it. It's gonna suck, but you're gonna come back stronger than ever each time," his therapist, Susan, replied. Tony and May had insisted Peter needed one, and as much as Peter hated to admit it, he knew it was true. 

But this one, this one wasn't that bad. She was straight-forward, and didn't sugercoat things. 

Peter decided that he liked her.

**

"I'm just so tired, you know? And sometimes it really fucking sucks, and I just want it to end. I want all the bullshit to end, I just want it to be  _quiet._ "

"Do you think about dying?"

"Yeah. There are days where I just sit on the roof, leaning forward. But I don't jump. Or fall."

"And why is that, Peter?"

"Because I know that someone's there for me. Mister Stark and May, I mean."

"That's good Peter. That's really good."

**

"How do you feel today?"

"Like, do I want to die? I always want to. Always want the quiet, the peace. Maybe see Uncle Ben and my parents again. But today isn't as bad,"

"And why is that, do you think?"

"Tony. May. My family. I have a lot of people who care. A part of me doesn't want to leave them."

"And the other part?"

"The other part thinks I'm selfish. That I shouldn't inconvenience them. That they're gonna leave me when I'm better."

"And the other other part?"

"The other other part thinks I should die."

**

"And today?"

"It's worse today, I think."

"Why do you think that?"

"May's taking more shifts at the hospital. Tony's at a meeting. I just feel like they don't wanna be around me anymore. They're basically all that's keeping me here. And if they aren't here, what's the point?"

"The point is they're still here. Which means you can't leave them."

**

"Hi."

"Hi, Peter."

"It's bad. It's really fucking bad today."

"Did you try?"

"No. At least, I don't think. I sat on the roof. I stole one of Tony's drinks."

"You sat on a roof drinking?"

"Yeah."

"What else did you do on the roof?"

"Considered jumping off."

"But you didn't."

"Yeah. If I go, I don't want to do it by jumping off a building. Too many memories of Spider-Man."

**

"How do you want to go?"

"Out of all the options? Probably by taking pills. It's quick. Easy. Painless."

"What other options have you considered?"

"Shooting. That's how Uncle Ben died. It seems fitting that I go like he did. I killed him after all."

"Any else?"

"Jumping off a building, but like I said. Too many memories. I think that's also why I won't shoot myself."

"Peter, everything you say in here is confidential. But, by law, I'm legally obliged to tell May and Tony if your considering killing yourself."

"I know. But they already know. That I'm thinking about these kind of things, I mean. Tony caught me on the roof once. Told May. But, I wasn't drinking that time. And I was pretty far away from the ledge. I told them I was just thinking, that I needed air. Which, isn't a total lie once you think about it. Anyway, I think they caught on either way."

**

"One to ten."

"What?"

"On a scale of one to ten. How much do you want to die?"

"Right now? Maybe a five."

"That's good. We can work with five."

**

"One to ten."

"Seven."

"Why's it worse today?"

"The Avengers went on a mission today. I mean, May is still here. She's waiting outside. But what if they don't come back? What if they decide that they like it better off without me?"

"What if, Peter. We're dealing with what ifs. Possibilities. There are other possibilities. They could decide that you're a real benefit to the team. They could decide that you're an amazing, smart kid, which you are. They could be thinking how much they miss you."

**

"One."

"I'm glad you're feeling better, Pete. What happened?"

"The team came back. They smiled and gave me hugs. We all watched  _Star Wars._ Felt like a real family."

"Then why isn't it a zero today?"

"Because the voices are still there."

"What are the voices saying?"

"Different things. But they're all saying something along the lines of, "They don't want you. They'll be leaving you soon."

"Do you think you will ever reach a zero?"

"Do I think so? No. But I hope so."

"That's a good start, kiddo. A really good one."

 

**

"Hello."

"No one to ten today?"

"No. I can see it in your eyes. What happened?"

"Tony left."

"He's coming back."

"I don't know that for sure. He's on a fucking plane. Planes crash all the time. My parents left me that way."

"Planes are one of the safest forms of travel. And your parents didn't leave you."

"They aren't here with me. And if not the plane, he's Tony fucking Stark. A lot of people want to kill him."

"Tony's not stupid. He'll be careful. He's gonna come back, Peter."

"You don't know that."

"But I do know him. He cares about you too much to leave you. He's coming back, Peter."

**

"Maybe all this was a mistake."

"What do you mean by 'all this'"?

"Getting close to Tony and the others. If they leave me it's gonna be harder. Maybe I should have ignored him. It would be easier for when he leaves."

"I told you, he's not leaving. You're not making a mistake, Peter."

"It feels like it."

**

Susan eventually prescribes an antidepressant drug. After a continuous stream of "eights" and "nines" Peter clearly needs it. May and Tony had been reluctant, Peter was only fifteen after all. She assured them that that was the exact reason why Peter wasn't on the drug before, but now it's clear that he really needs it. The parents had clenched their eyes shut, then signed all the necessary papers. 

"There are side effects. Seeing as Peter is young, it may hit him harder. Can someone keep an eye on him all the time?"

May looked at Tony worriedly.

"I can't, my job...,"

But Tony had no such problems or hesitations.

"Pepper can attend my meetings. The Avengers had survived without Iron Man before. Don't worry about it, I can stay with him."

May shot Tony a grateful smile.

**

Peter hated it. He hated every time he had to take it.

"T'ny," he slurs sleepily one day.

"Yeah, kiddo?"

"D'n't like it."

"Don't like what, Pete?"

"The dru'. Makes me feel weird. Voices are l'der. Feel fuzzy."

"But it'll help in the long way, kiddo. I'm sorry."

"T'ny?"

"Yeah, son?"

"Wh'n 'm g'nna feel better?"

"I don't know, kiddie. Soon."

"T'ny?"

"Yeah, Pete?"

"D'n't leave me."

"Not planning on it."

"I d'n't mean now. I mean nev'r. Pr'mise you're nev'r leaving."

"I'm not leaving you. Never planned to, and never will."

"T'ny?"

"Yeah?"

"Mmm. Love you."

"Me too, Peter. Me too."

**

One day, the drug hits him particularly hard. He finally snaps. He was doing so well, he thinks, but he finally snapped. He runs out of his room and onto the roof harder than he ever has ran before. He collapses, right on the edge, sobbing. 

He stays there for a while, just crying.

But then he picks himself up and carries himself to Tony's room.

"Peter!"

Peter falls into Tony's arms, a crying, sobbing mess.

"I can't do this anymore, Dad. I can't. I wanna die, I wanna die, I wanna-,"

Tony cuts him off, bringing Peter's head to his chest while he cries. He wraps Peter's legs around his waist, and carries him to the bed.

"You're okay, kiddie. And you know what? I'm so happy and proud of you. You came to me instead. And I'm so glad you're still here, Peter."

Peter turns face deeper into his father's chest, curling his fingers tightly around Tony's shirt.

"I can't do this anymore. I don't want to," he cries, words muffled by Tony's shirt.

"I know, kiddo. I know. But it'll be better soon. Okay? I'll fix this, I promise. You're gonna be fine."

"But I don't wanna be fine! I wanna die, dad, I don't want to do this anymore! I can't do this anymore!" he sobs.

"Peter-,"

"I told myself this stupid drug would help, I told myself that it would be fine, I told myself that it would get better! I told myself I would try! I'm tired of trying. I don't want to anymore."

Tony wrapped his arms tighter around his kid, his own tears threatening to spill.

"No, Peter. You have to keep trying, okay? And I'm so so so glad that you were trying. I need you to keep trying, okay kiddie?"

"I-I can't. I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't-,"

"Peter. Breathe. You're gonna get better, but you need to breathe."

Tony guides Peter's ear to his heart, whispering, "Listen to my heart, Peter. Breathe with me, okay?"

But Peter can't. He can't because he can't do anything, and  _fuck_ he just wants it all to stop, he's to tired, he just wants to give up, he  _doesn't want to._

"Pete. I got you, okay? And you might not believe it right now, but there is no one that I would rather be with right now. I want to stay here, with you. I want to be your dad, and I want you to be my son. But you need to breathe."

And Peter does.

_Breathe._

"I got you."

_Breathe._

"I love you."

_Breathe._

"You're gonna be fine."

_Breathe._

"I'm never leaving you."

_Breathe._

"You are worth it."

And so, Peter breathes.

Peter breathes, and Peter lives.

**

As soon as Peter falls asleep, Tony calls Susan to tell her that he's going to stop giving Peter the drug. He talked it over with May, and he can't give something to his kid that makes him want to kill himself. 

He can't and he wouldn't.

Susan immediately agrees, she won't have her patient on something like that either. Especially not Peter.

**

"Hi, Peter."

Peter looks at the ground and doesn't respond, nudging the table leg with his toe.

"Tony called. We won't be giving you the drug anymore. It wasn't helping, I can see that."

Peter finally looks up.

"No more?" he whispers.

"Yeah, Peter. No more."

"Thank you."

"It's not a problem. We just want you to be okay."

**

 It takes time. It takes a really long fucking time.

It took tears.

It took sweat.

It took parts of sanity.

But sanity can be regained.

They say that time heals all wounds.

Sure enough, with time, Peter Parker healed.

He had a family.

A home.

A dad.

He had everything he wanted.

It wasn't easy. Countless therapy sessions, countless hugs, infinite nightmares.

But Peter Parker healed.

Peter Parker beat his demons.

Peter Parker escaped hell and kicked it in its sorry ass.

Peter Parker  _lived._

_Peter Parker breathed._

_Peter Parker mended._

_Peter Parker healed._

Peter Parker lived.

**

As for Jeremy Spangled, he died in Tony Stark's cell, along with his cousin. After over a month of constant torture, he had spilled the beans. 

Damian Toomes was hiding out in Queens, in a rundown apartment.

Needless to say, Damian Toomes died by Tony Stark's hand.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end has arrived. This story was really fucking fun to write, and thank you guys so fucking much for reading it and sticking with it. I guess I lied when I said we had a long way to go... but in a way, I didn't. Like I said, this story individually may be over but it's not over. Sequel, here we come:)  
> Any final thoughts? Please tell me. I love you all.


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